Dracula's Dog (1978) aka Zoltan, Hound of Dracula aka Zoltan il Cane di Dracula aka Dracula contro Zombi

 3 / 5 Jul '09
Tagline: Man's best friend is now man's worst fiend
Directed by: Albert Band
Written by: Frank Ray Perilli
Actors include: Michael Pataki, Jan Shutan, Libby Chase
Genre: Horror
Length: 90 minutes
Banned: Nope
Country: USA/Italy

Review:
Now this is definitely a cheaply made film that delivers exactly what it promises. An angry dog that belonged to Dracula who is sprung from a grave after a stake is removed from it's heart. From there it removes the stake from the servant of Dracula who comes to life also. They find out that the only living descendent of Dracula is nearby, so they go and bother him. Of course he's a family man with a dog of his own and now he has to defend his family and himself from this vampiric dog. It's silly, never scary (shining flashlights into a dog's eyes doesn't exactly freak me out), the costuming department is well less than skilled and it gets pretty dull pretty fast. They try with a few scenes of gore, but nothing too exciting. I'd say it's slightly better than Devil Dog: The Hound of Hell which came out around the same time with similar result. This one tried a bit harder and was more violent, but the other was more laughable.

Availability:  On DVD

A Night to Dismember (1983)

1.5 / 5 Jul '09
Tagline: N/A
Directed by: Doris Wishman
Written by: Judy J. Kushner
Actors include: Samantha Fox, Diane Cummins, Saul Meth
Genre: Horror
Length: 69 minutes
Banned: Nope
Country: USA

Review:
Well, I've actually seen the worst made movie ever, and A Night to Dismember be thy name. The plot is nothing more but a hodge podge of roughly clipped together bloody and ridiculously fake looking killings. An example a trick knife for example can look somewhat real if simply thrust into a victim, but when pulled back and forth and one can see the knife retracting...it's pretty darned laughable. Actually this movie works wonderfully as a comedy, the first 30 minutes (and it's only 69 minutes long) were hysterical, I was laughing with tears in my eyes. See the film is so shoddily put together it's mainly strewn together using ridiculous narration, ie "She was dead on the floor, then her sister fell on an axe, she's now dead" then cut to the next scene. Doris Wishman is the entity behind this project, she directed, produced, edited and so on this entire film. Thing is, she stinks at editing, parts of the ends of sentences are cut off, some of the scenes are shown in reverse or a few times by mistake. There are clearly pieces of film entirely missing with no explanation, the sound has sometimes two songs at once, or one warping and cutting in and out...it's really quite something. Even more funny is that Doris was around 70 years old when she directed this...it's filled with nothing but cheap killing, tits and sleaze. After the first half the novelty wore off and I was really bored (with the exception of a few more silly killings), this really is bad in every possible way. I've heard Doris referred to as the female Edward D. Wood, Jr. and I wouldn't give her that much credit. This could be huge laughs with some booze at a party as it seriously was so bad it was funny but wow...I cannot believe this movie even exists nor can I imagine a film being any worse.

Availability:  On DVD

What Ever Happened to Aunt Alice?(1969)

 4 / 5 Jul '09
Tagline: A horrific tale...with grave consequences!
Directed by: Lee H. Katzin
Written by: Theodore Apstein, Ursula Curtiss
Actors include: Geraldine Page, Ruth Gordon, Rosemary Forsyth
Genre: Horror, Comedy, Thriller, Crime, Mystery
Length: 101 minutes
Banned: Nope
Country: USA

Review:
Now this was a cute little black comedy/thriller that surprisingly doesn't get mentioned very often. Geraldine Page was great as the widow who finds out that she is no longer rich and that her husband was worth nothing when he died. She can't bear the thought of living without money so she devises a plan. Kill the servants and steal their money, what a fantastic idea (plus corpses make the trees grow quite nicely). When she takes in Ruth Gordon after finding out she has a tidy sum saved she meets her match as she does a little sleuthing herself. It's not very heavy handled at all which I like, it's not the sort of film that would have one falling over with laughter but definitely a few snickers are in order. It's even got some creepy moments when you just know something terrible is going to happen. It builds up a fair bit of tension, it entertains, amuses and I quite enjoyed this flick from beginning to end.

Availability:  On DVD

The Fifth Cord (1971) aka Giornata nera per l'ariete aka Evil Fingers

 3.5 / 5 Jul '09
Tagline: N/A
Directed by: Luigi Bazzoni
Written by: Luigi Bazzoni, David McDonald Devine
Actors include: Franco Nero, Silvia Monti, Wolfgang Preiss
Genre: Horror, Mystery, Thriller
Length: 90 minutes
Banned: Nope
Country: Italy

Review:
This is one giallo that fits the bill to a tee, the multiple winding staircases, the J&B, the beautiful locations for shooting, twists in the plot and so on. It's actually quite well made surprisingly considering this is one of the lesser known ones. It features Franco Nero in the lead as an alcoholic reporter. There is a murderer going around cutting the finger off a glove for each killing (guess how many are planned!). The problem is the reporter never has an alibi and he blacks himself out drunk on a nightly basis so he's not even sure that he's innocent. There are many who could be guilty though and between the Police and Franco, someone will get to the bottom of this! The murders are quite bloodless for the most part, and this one is more story driven. At least most of the "talky" scenes take place in some magnificent location so we can always stare off into that when it gets a little dull. The mystery is well let's just say I wouldn't bother trying to solve it if I were you, it's an interesting conclusion but we definitely don't have enough facts and it could drive a person mad trying, just hang on and wait to be filled in. An odd entry into the genre, but it's at least lovely to watch, and Nero is a treat!

Availability:  On DVD

The Babysitter (1980)

2.5 / 5 Jul '09
Tagline: N/A
Directed by: Peter Medak
Written by: Jennifer Miller
Actors include: Patty Duke, William Shatner, Quinn Cummings
Genre: Thriller, Drama
Length: 96 minutes
Banned: Nope
Country: USA

Review:
I'd read somewhere that this was basically the original version of The Hand That Rocks the Cradle, which I quite liked so I was intrigued. Now this fable is made-for-tv, and stars Patty Duke and William Shatner as parents who don't have time for their daughter, and they just moved so they don't really know anybody. We can tell something is up when a young lady starts befriending their daughter, she makes up enough lies to get herself invited on as Nanny and house cleaner. It's seriously very much the same as The Hand That Rocks the Cradle in nearly every way except this is missing the excitment factor, the budget and the killing. It managed to create creepy moods and it stayed interesting to watch most of the time because it was hard to tell what the babysitter's ultimate goal was in places. It was a promising idea and I'm sure whomever made The Hand That Rocks the Cradle watched this, but other than that there isn't much to say here. Not one to try to see, but if you really like evil caretakers it's worth a gander, just don't get your hopes up too high.

Availability:  Never on DVD as far as I know
Part 1:  http://www.megaupload.com/?d=RQEGGU36
Part 2:  http://www.megaupload.com/?d=USVG5X7S
Part 3:  http://www.megaupload.com/?d=32FY3AII
*as far as I know this is unavailable everywhere, if you are the owner of the copyright and wish this to be removed, I will do so immediately thanks & enjoy!

Obsession (1976)

4 / 5 Jul '09
Tagline: The love story that will scare the life out of you
Directed by: Brian De Palma
Written by: Brian De Palma
Actors include: Cliff Robertson, Genevieve Bujold, John Lithgow
Genre: Thriller, Mystery
Length: 98 minutes
Banned: Nope
Country: USA

Review:
I can now say that I've seen most of Brian De Palma's thrillers that this is probably the least exciting one, still it's pretty darned decent. The story is about a man who's destroyed when his wife and daughter are kidnapped, and then the rescue attempt goes wrong and they are both pronounced dead. From there he's desperately trying to get his life back which includes meeting a woman who resembles his wife very heavily. What I wasn't anticipating was the slowness of the romantic segment in the middle, the story picks up big time afterwards, but the middle was a bit trying. At least even during the slow parts this had my attention as I had to know what was going on (you can tell something isn't quite right). It's not the most intense thriller, but a satisfying one, even if the ending was a missed opportunity. Still pretty cool and worthwhile, especially considering it's one of his least known.

Availability:  On DVD

Killer's Delight (1978) aka The Sports Killer aka The Dark Ride

2.5 / 5 Jul '09
Tagline: A small town. Five girls in one week. It's been fun
Directed by: Jeremy Hoenack
Written by: Marayln Thoma
Actors include: Joe Ivy, John Karlen, James Luisi
Genre: Horror, Thriller
Length: 85 minutes
Banned: Nope
Country: USA

Review:
Now this was a gamble, see Code Red and Shriek Show co-released this one, and since I purchase most of what either company releases I was interested in this. Even more intriguing was the fact that it currently only has 35 votes on the IMDB, that's a pretty unheard of movie! To make this sound even more appealing also, this is one of the first films based around Ted Bundy so that got my attention too. At first when I started watching it I thought the picture quality was quite nice, it looked as though first time director Jeremy Hoenack did a relatively nice job shooting the film. The acting was so incredibly flat and dead behind the eyes that the story was dull, I really struggled to make it to the end of the movie despite a semi-promising beginning. Basically we watch a few girls get kidnapped, then they turn up naked and dead (not graphically, and the violence is most often not shown, so it's not all that satisfying on a horror level). There are no thrills, no chills, only a slight surprise and a Police officer who resembles John Saxon but isn't. I've certainly seen worse, but the over abundance of sound effects (the guy who made this became a huge sound effect dude) it really sounded like it was too carried away and often that was laugh inducing, but that's about it. Not something to seek out but at least it looks somewhat professional and some good ideas were here.

Availability:  On DVD

Arlington Road (1999)

 3.5 / 5
Tagline: Fear Thy Neighbor
Directed by: Mark Pellington
Written by: Ehren Kruger
Actors include: Jeff Bridges, Tim Robbins, Joan Cusack
Genre: Thriller, Mystery, Drama
Length: 117 minutes
Banned: Nope
Country: USA

Review:
Always make sure who know who your neighbors are... When Michael Faraday (Jeff Bridges) catches his neighbor (Tim Robbins) in a lie he starts investigating. See Michael's job is as a professor who teaches classes on terrorism so he's ultra suspicious, but does he have any right to be? Once his son starts spending more and more time next door things start to get a little uneasy and dangerous. There are a few good chase scenes and there is definitely some excitement to be had with this one. It just seems like with the ideas they have here they could have made this a little less predictable. Still, you could do much worse, this one at least holds attention.

Availability:  On DVD & Blu-Ray

Armageddon (1998)

3 / 5
Tagline: It's Closer Than You Think.
Directed by: Michael Bay
Written by: Jonathan Hensleigh, J.J. Abrams
Actors include: Bruce Willis, Billy Bob Thornton, Ben Affleck
Genre: Sci-Fi, Action
Length: 150 minutes
Banned: Nope
Country: USA

Review:
Oh now, it's not that bad...it has a beginning, an end, a budget, and a cast you've probably heard of. Then again it's not that good either...irritating soundtrack, cliche city, bad love story, could never even remotely happen and so on. The plot is about a huge asteroid that is headed for the earth and everyone will die if it isn't stopped. The government decides the best course of action is to get pro drillers (erm yeah) to go up there and drill the problem. At least it isn't taking itself too seriously, and the little attempts at giving the drillers personalities was nice. In order to fix this you really would need a new plot, get rid of Ben Affleck and get a new director...but as is it's not that bad. Suspend belief and be remotely entertained.

Availability:  On DVD & Blu-Ray

Air Force One (1997)

3.5 / 5
Tagline: Harrison Ford is the President of the United States.
Directed by: Wolfgang Petersen
Written by: Andrew W. Marlowe
Actors include: Harrison Ford, Gary Oldman, Glenn Close
Genre: Thriller, Action, Drama
Length: 124 minutes
Banned: Nope
Country: USA/Germany

Review:
Admit it...you've always wondered what would happen if Harrison Ford were the President, haven't you! Well this pretty much answers that question, he'd kick butt and not negotiate with terrorists. In this case the President and his family are on Air Force One (how did you guess) when suddenly they find out that some of the crew are actually evil Russian hi-jackers. They vow to kill a hostage every half hour until their demands are met but as I mentioned earlier Mr. President is only interested in negotiating with his fist! It's pretty straightforward and predictable, and let's face it, it's not earth shatteringly unique. Still it delivers exactly what one might expect and it has some exciting moments...all in all not a bad little thriller.

Availability:  On DVD

8MM (1999)

 4 / 5
Tagline: You can't prepare for where the truth will take you.
Directed by: Joel Shumacher
Written by: Andrew Kevin Walker
Actors include: Nicholas Cage, Joaquin Phoenix, James Gandolfini
Genre: Thriller
Length: 123 minutes
Banned: Nope
Country: USA/Germany

Review:
Ahhh the snuff film thriller, with...Nicolas Cage already that should be enough information for you to know if you are interested or not. I tend to find Cage's overacting and ridiculousness quite funny and I've always been intrigued by the idea of snuff films actually existing (no I've never seen one). In this one Cage is a private dick who is on a mission to find a girl who appears in some snuff video to prove if it's real or not (once an old man croaks and his wife finds the film). Amusingly Cage makes a porn store clerk friend (Joaquin Phoenix) who helps him on their dangerous trek to find out who made the tape. It's relatively exciting, particularly the climax where a skipping record is actually seriously freaky! It's better than you might think it is, but if you want to learn more about the existence of snuff films from this, you are barking up the wrong tree.

Availability:  On DVD

Perversion Story (1969) aka Una Sull'altra aka One on Top of the Other aka Una Historia Pervera

 4 / 5 Jul '09
Tagline: What Is The Most Incredible Thing A Woman Ever Did For $1,000,000?
Directed by: Lucio Fulci
Written by: Lucio Fulci
Actors include: Jean Sorel, Marisa Mell, Elsa Martinelli
Genre: Thriller, Drama
Length: 97 minutes
Banned: Nope
Country: Italy/France/Spain

Review:
While not my favorite Lucio Fulci flick or even one of my favorite giallo films, this was still rather entertaining. The plot revolves around man who hires a nurse for his Wife, then she ends up dead. After he buries her he notices a stripper who looks remarkably like his dead wife, only she's a blond with green eyes. Things start going horribly wrong regarding the death of his wife as suspicions have landed upon him. This flick is not gory, nor is it bloody nor does much in the way of death happen (though there is a corpse or two). The story at least winds together nicely in the end and it's pretty easy to follow. The sets are rather groovy and oddly this one takes place in San Francisco so the scenery is nice (though the jerky airplane shots were a little too frequent). There is a load of boobage in this, so if you like to look at attractive naked girls, that should be an added bonus for ya. Probably not something I'll rush out to watch again right away but an interesting addition to the land of giallo, and something yet again entirely different from the multi-talented Lenzi. Oh and for the record, I'm not quite sure what's so perverse about this 'un, they could have come up with a better title me thinks.

Availability:  On DVD

Marathon Man (1976)

 4 / 5 Jul '09
Tagline: N/A
Directed by: John Schlesinger
Written by: William Goldman
Actors include: Dustin Hoffman, Laurence Olivier, Roy Scheider
Genre: Crime, Thriller
Length: 125 minutes
Banned: Nope
Country: USA

Review:
This will probably make me sound a bit like a jerk, but I actually expected more from this. I expected one of the most thrillin' thrillers with scenes of extreme torture (oh just from the little bits I've read here and there) which of course it's not. What we do have is a good plot, some creepy Nazis, a horde of diamonds and a bit mystery and intrigue. Dustin Hoffman plays a marathon runner who's brother turns up dead. From that point on he's wound up in a strange situation where folks are turning up dead, people are harassing him and so on. He has to figure out what's going on basically having no information and he has to do it quickly with a few nasty little surprises along the way. The second half was seriously exciting and fun, it's just the first half where we don't quite get what's going on either are a little trying. It's an interesting flick that I did enjoy, it just wasn't as horrifying as I had anticipated but at least the story was neat.

Availability:  On DVD

Body Double (1984)

4.5 / 5 Jul '09
Tagline: A seduction. A mystery. A Murder.
Directed by: Brian De Palma
Written by: Brian De Palma, Robert J. Avrech
Actors include: Craig Wasson, Melanie Griffith, Deborah Shelton
Genre: Thriller, Horror
Length: 114 minutes
Banned: Nope
Country: USA

Review:
Another cool thriller from Brian De Palma that definitely borrows from Alfred Hitchcock however his story has been updated and his unique perverted spin has been applied. The story is about an unemployed actor who is staying in a really odd sky tower style of house while his friend goes away. His friend also introduces him to the telescope which happens to peer into the window of an attractive girl who strip teases in her window. He starts to watch her but before long he finds out he is not the only one who is watching her, someone far more ominous is. He starts becoming obsessed with the situation and before long he witnesses a gruesome murder. As he's trying to figure out what's going on he winds up entangled with the Porn industry and all sorts of interesting turns happen. This is definitely an adult film with loads of voyeurism and a wicked violent drill death (yay for horror) so kiddies stay away! It's a pretty darned good tale although I wish the ending were a little less muddled but that is really my only complaint. I can't wait to see the other thrillers from Brian De Palma, between this, Blow Out and Dressed to Kill I'm nearly ready to build a shrine to him!

Availability:  On DVD

Who Saw Her Die? (1972) aka Chi I'ha Vista Morire? aka The Child aka The Child - Die Stradt wird zum Alptraum

 3 / 5 Jul '09

Tagline: N/A
Directed by: Aldo Lado
Written by: Francesco Barilli, Massimo D'Avak
Actors include: George Lazenby, Anita Strindberg, Adolfo Celi
Genre: Horror, Thriller
Length: 90 minutes
Banned: Nope
Country: Italy/West Germany

Review:
I definitely hoped for more on this one, for starters the soundtrack (which surprisingly Ennio Morricone was responsible for) was wretched, it gave me a freakin' headache. It was like Jingle Cats, only more obnoxious...with a loud choir of children singing in echoes looped and stuff...and it's nearly all the time, it was making me mental! It was cool that the mood was at least ominous on this one, serious as can be and well quite different than most gialli as it wasn't as psychedelic, or sleazy. It was nicely filmed, and I do appreciate that Aldo Lado tried to give us something different with this one. It does deal with the murders of two little girls, and of course some adults die along the way and the mystery is out there to be solved by the second little girl's Dad. It was just so slowly paced and dull that it was hard to pay attention to the mystery part or even care who did what or why! It didn't really satisfy on a horror level, and it didn't really satisfy as a mystery yet I was able to sit through it and again the idea was a decent one. Just one of the least exciting giallo films I've come across so far unfortunately.

Availability:  On DVD

Pacific Heights (1990)

 4 / 5 Jul '09
Tagline: Where Terror Lives
Directed by: John Schlesinger
Written by: Daniel Pryne
Actors include: Melanie Griffith, Matthew Modine, Michael Caine
Genre: Thriller, Crime
Length: 102 minutes
Banned: Nope
Country: USA

Review:
This is one pretty aggravating thriller...but it annoys in a good way! See Michael Caine plays the ultimate tenant from hell (okay not literally but he's awful bad news just the same). Melanie Griffith and Matthew Modine play a young couple who decide to take on this large Victorian house with two rental units in order to make some money. They spend all of their money and hard work on fixing this place up and before they know it, Caine has moved in...and let's just say he's not exactly leaving. It turns into a pretty scary situation as nobody can get into Caine's apartment and we are never quite sure what he's up to next. I think anyone who's ever rented out a building could relate to this one (okay not exactly but in a way), and it should be a good warning to watch out who you deal with. Pretty intense and cool thriller that definitely makes it's point, and then some.

Availability:  On DVD

Vengeance of the Zombies (1973) aka La Rebelion de las Muertas aka Revolt of the Dead Ones aka The Rebellion of the Dead Women aka Walk of the Dead

2 / 5 Jul '09
Tagline: A Modern Day Gothic Tale Of Horror And Fear
Directed by: Leon Klimovsky
Written by: Paul Naschy
Actors include: Paul Naschy, Romy, Mirta Miller
Genre: Horror
Length: 90 minutes
Banned: Nope
Country: Spain

Review:
I actually got this on blu-ray in a 2fer with another Paul Naschy, so I finally gave Mr. Naschy a chance. The picture was definitely clear...really clear...only that really didn't help this muddy ridiculous story. The first problem is that Paul himself plays three characters...the Devil, and two brothers, and he's a horrible actor (not so bad it's funny though...well kind of I suppose). The story is muddled and who even cares to try to decipher it, it has something to do with zombies, voodoo and revenge I think (and yes I watched the whole damned thing). It's extremely cheap, and the zombies look more like smurfs with their blue body paint than anything. Scares are non-existent and although there is some red paint spilled here and there, there isn't anything I can see a horror fan getting excited about. Seriously a weak attempt at making a film, one can only hope the rest of his material is better than this one (more because I've bought more of his films and I hope they are better...I'm just not about to find out for quite some time after this disaster). Oh I should mention that there was one thing I liked about this...the soundtrack, I would even consider listening to it on it's own! It's sort of jazzy and groovy and cool (the sets are sometimes groovy too), but I actually found myself humming a few numbers from this, but that is the nicest thing I can say. Avoid unless you like really bad and pointless films...then you may enjoy this...but I doubt it.

Availability:  On DVD and Blu-Ray

Dressed to Kill (1980)

 4.5 / 5 Jul '09
Tagline: The Latest Fashion in Murder
Directed by: Brian De Palma
Written by: Brian De Palma
Actors include: Michael Caine, Angie Dickinson, Nancy Allen
Genre: Thriller, Horror
Length: 105 minutes
Banned: Nope
Country: USA

Review:
This one starts out slow...I mean it takes a bit for the story to develop...plus Angie Dickinson is relatively annoying in this and the first bit centers on her. She's clearly in need of a good lay, so she chases around a guy in a museum before going back to his house. When she turns up brutally slashed in an elevator Nancy Allen gets involved as fingers seem to be pointing at her. Of course there is much more going on here...it is an American giallo after all although it doesn't follow all of the "rules" you'll find several nice nods for genre fans. This has one twisty turny plot that once it gets going it's hard to look away from! Seriously hang on and you will be generously rewarded...if you want blood, great story or a good mystery to solve this has it all! Brian De Palma has done it again, and although I've heard that this is his best I still prefer Blow Out but I definitely think this one was awesome too!

Availability:  On DVD

Island of Death (1975) aka Ta Paidia tou Diavolou aka Devils in Mykonos aka A Craving for Lust aka Cruel Destination aka Island of Perversion aka Psyc

4.5 / 5 Jul '09
Tagline: The lucky ones simply got their brains blown out.
Directed by: Nico Mastorakis
Written by: Nico Mastorakis
Actors include: Robert Behling, Jane Lyle, Jessica Dublin
Genre: Horror, Exploitation
Length: 108 minutes
Banned: UK
Country: Greece

Review:
There are video nasties, and then there is this...which yes is a video nasty but it's more like THE video nasty. This takes the cake for the most perverse and sleazy film I've ever seen...seriously. The thing is, the film is made in the style of oh say John Waters and Herschell Gordon Lewis only way more extreme and unrelenting! It takes place in the island of the Mykonos where we meet a couple who seem to be vacationing...until we learn they are hiding from the law. Why? Well simply because they are monsters! The movies is filled with sexual perversity including a golden shower and let's just say there is a "goat scene" really those were the part of this film that I could have done without! What it does have are some of the best deaths I've ever seen in any movie including scenes involving a lime pit and an airplane! The part I really liked was how it's filmed like a black comedy...while these horrible things are going on our characters are laughing and making jokes and happier than anything...it's really freakish and hilarious (if you are demented). This is what Natural Born Killers should have been....although I doubt it would have been distributed! This is one unforgettable film but in that sense, please make sure that you really want to see this before attempting because remember you can't unsee things. Fortunately the low budget made this way less disturbing, and the beautiful scenery in the Mykonos made it extra interesting. This is something that some will absolutely need to see but that most will never want to see...plus it's really hard to find. Worth it for weirdos like myself undoubtedly....I was enthralled!

Availability:  On DVD

Sette Note in Nero (1977) aka The Psychic aka Seven Notes in Black aka Murder to the Tune of the Seven Black Notes

 3.5 / 5 Jul '09
Tagline: N/A
Directed by: Lucio Fulci
Written by: Lucio Fulci
Actors include: Jennifer O'Neill, Gabriele Ferzetti, Marc Porel
Genre: Thriller, Horror
Length: 95 minutes
Banned: Nope
Country: Italy

Review:
I hate to say that I kind of expected more from Fulci, especially since the back read that it's one of Quentin Tarrantino's favs! I actually found the sets and things to be rather drab and strangely it was missing the sleaze factor (which okay I can do without if it's not too drab). It did have the odd "Fulci gore" touch, but murders are definitely few and far between...seriously it lacks there. What is good is the actual story, quite a fun little puzzle for the "by the books thriller" sort of crowd. It's about a woman who has visions who sees the death of someone and a bunch of different things flash before her eyes and she has to try to solve what happened. Especially when the body she saw turns up to be in the same place walled in a building. Unfortunately I thought it was a bit too easy to figure out as we'd both predicted the ending before we hit the halfway point. Still although it was a bit too dry to be an awesome thriller, it is effective, it all makes sense and I've definitely seen worse.

Availability:  On DVD

Scorpion with Two Tails (1982) aka Assassinio al Ci Mitero Etrusco aka Murder in an Etruscan Cemetery aka Il Mistero degli Etruschi aka Crime au Cimet

 2 / 5 Jul '09
Tagline: N/A
Directed by: Sergio Martino
Written by: Ernesto Gastaldi
Actors include: Elvire Audray, Paolo Malco, Claudio Cassinelli
Genre: Horror, Thriller
Length: 98 minutes
Banned: Nope
Country: Italy/France

Review:
Well no wonder Sergio Martino used an alias for directing this thing, it is dull dull dull and lacks all of the life he usually breaths into his films. It's drab instead of colorful, the plot has several stories going on, none of which are the slightest bit interesting. It's something to do with some ancient crates from the Etruscan society, one of them has drugs in it, so part of this has to do with that. There is also something going on about a dame who thinks she is immortal as it is written on some wall in an ancient language. The whole thing is set up like a gialli although it really doesn't have many of the good things that gialli films have. An example are the deaths, in this instead of offering anything slightly realistic looking or even any blood everyone who dies just has their head turned around. In other words, they just put clothes backwards on people (Kris Kross must have been taking note). The resolve of this situation is entirely unsatisfying and it's nearly impossible to pay attention or care even after a half hour of this nonsense. Hugely disappointing film that I'll never ever want to watch again nor could I recommend it to even the biggest of Sergio Martino fans...just avoid!

Availability:  On DVD

My Dear Killer (1972) aka Mio Caro Assassino aka Sumario Sangriento de la Pequena Estefania

 3.5 / 5 Jul '09
Tagline: N/A
Directed by: Tonio Valerii
Written by: Roberto Leoni, Franco Bucceri
Actors include: George Hilton, Salvo Randone, William Berger, Manuel Zarzo
Genre: Horror, Thriller
Length: 96 minutes
Banned: Nope
Country: Italy/Spain

Review:
This started off remarkably strong with one of the best gialli deaths I've ever seen (or imagined)! From there it's a rather tightly wound and extremely detailed gialli that unfortunately gets a little dull in places and could use some brightening up. Our story revolves around the kidnapping of a young girl and a bunch of people turning up dead that possibly know something about her or who could have killed her. George Hilton plays to type the Inspector trying to solve the mystery and actually some of the conclusions are quite interesting. The end bit however before they identify who is responsible goes on way too long to the point where I almost didn't care who had done it. Did everyone really have to look in a mirror and asked if guilty? Overall though it did have some great moments, and it had a decent story, it's just not one of the absolute best, but one to check out once you've gone through the big ones.

Availability:  On DVD

Zeder (1983) aka Zeder: Voices from Darkness aka Revenge of the Dead aka Zeder: Voices from the Beyond aka Zeder: Voci dal Buio

 4 / 5 Jul '09
Tagline: One man's search for an ancient secret...and the dead will rise from their graves!
Directed by: Pupi Avati
Written by: Pupi Avati, Antonio Avati
Actors include: Gabriele Lavia, Anne Canovas, Paola Tanziani
Genre: Horror
Length: 98 minutes
Banned: Nope
Country: Italy

Review:
This is one heck of an unusual flick, and if you've seen "House with the Laughing Windows" (Pupi's other main horror offering) than you have an idea the sort of confusing yet somehow classy tale you are in for even though the two have little in common story wise. This is a sort of ghost/zombie flick really, hard to say and it's not a point that really matters as this is simply creepy and atmospheric, never gratuitous. In other words if you came to this looking for deaths and gore you will probably leave unimpressed. The story is somewhere between "Pet Semetary", "The Ring" and various other back ideas I've seen before yet this isn't derivative or something, just similar. It's a rather talky film, and it's quite confusing up until the end and even then parts could stand to be a little clearer (that or they shouldn't have gone into the detail about some things that they did as they really don't mean much to the plot). Still the ending is awesome even if you can see it coming, and Zeder is a rather creepy fellow and there are a few freaky parts mixed in too. It could have been amazing, but it's still really darned good, something I wasn't expecting but I liked anyhow!

Availability:  On DVD (but OOP...do not buy the cheap edition available now...it's a DVDR...I found out the hard way)

Death Wish 4: The Crackdown (1987)

 3 / 5 Jul '09
Tagline: The biggest Death Wish ever!
Directed by: J. Lee Thompson
Written by: Brian Garfield, Gail Morgan Hickman
Actors include: Charles Bronson, Kay Lenz, John P. Ryan
Genre: Thriller, Action
Length: 99 minutes
Banned: Finland
Country: USA

Review:
So the Death Wish continues, this is definitely drastically less entertaining than any of the Death Wish films preceding it unfortunately. This time Bronson just sees a Woman being attacked and starts going after the crooks. Then we meet his new girlfriend and her daughter, of course as he's starting to get adjusted the daughter overdoses and his war on drugs begins! This time the cops are sometimes involved and stuff so he's got everybody against him! It's still got a fair bit of violence of course, but it's beyond silly and the dialogue is absurdly bad. It's overly long and it seems completely uninspired, yet I didn't absolutely hate it or anything...stuff did blow up! Let's just say I'll probably still watch "Death Wish 5" but it won't be for quite a while.

Availability:  On DVD

5 Dolls for an August Moon (1970) aka 5 Bambole per la Luna D'agosto aka Island of Terror

3.5 / 5 Jul '09
Tagline: N/A
Directed by: Mario Bava
Written by: Mario di Nardo
Actors include: William Berger, Edwige Fenech, Ira von Furstnberg
Genre: Horror, Thriller
Length: 90 minutes
Banned: Nope
Country: Italy

Review:
This is a very stylish giallo but of course that is expected from someone like Bava. The cast is quite good, Edwige plays a skank as per usual, with a group of folks that have come to a small island to relax. A scientist has some invention (a type of metal or something) that is worth a ton of money that folks are dying to get their hands on! Well okay maybe it's not that simple and in fact even at the end of the movie it was a little muddled why some things happened that did. What was great was that after folks wind up dead they were put in the meat locker which were some of my favorite scenes...only Bava could make that cool! It has qualities of "Ten Little Indians" and it was relatively fun to watch, it just could have used a little more thought and detail, but heck for an early gialli it's still quite good. Better than expected, but not one of the best!

Availability:  On DVD

A Simple Plan (1998)

 4.5 / 5 Jul '09
Tagline: Sometimes good people do evil things.
Directed by: Sam Raimi
Written by: Scott B. Smith
Actors include: Bill Paxton, Bridget Fonda, Billy Bob Thornton
Genre: Thriller, Drama, Action
Length: 121 minutes
Banned: Nope
Country: France/UK/Germany/USA/Japan

Review:
I knew nothing about this film going into it, and I'm really glad I did. My husband had read the book, and if you have too they are apparently very much the same which is a good thing. It's a really interesting story about the effects of money on different people. Paxton along with his simple brother (Thornton) and his brother's friend stumble across a plane buried in the snow and a bag with over 4 million dollars in it. Of course plans start being formed, especially when Paxton's wife (Fonda) gets involved and soon the story is bending this way and that and well it's really something to watch unfold. Although this one breaks the two hour mark, it's a fascinating two hours and I really didn't want to look away for even a minute, it's doom filled and you can just feel everything falling apart...it's a must see! One of the best thrillers with a super cast (especially Thornton), this is a must see film that little ado has been made about but it deserves so much more!

Availability:  On DVD

Blow Out (1981)

 5 / 5 Jul '09
Tagline: The Blow Out took them to the edge of terror . . . his questions took them way beyond
Directed by: Brian De Palma
Written by: Brian De Palma
Actors include: John Travolta, Nancy Allen, John Lithgow
Genre: Thriller, Crime
Length: 108 minutes
Banned: Nope
Country: USA

Review:
Without a doubt one of the most thrilling, stylish and edge of the seat films I've ever seen. It's one of Quentin Tarantino's favorites and I can definitely see why as not a moment is wasted in this exciting film. Travolta plays a man who is the sound guy for horror films who just happens to record an accident. A car plunges into the water and he rushes to save a beautiful young girl (Nancy Allen), but folks seem to want to cover up the fact that she was in the car. In fact the man in the car that died was a Presidential hopeful, and the plot thickens. It gets so thick and twisted that you can't help but hang on to every word and clue until this magnificant film unwinds. The cinematography is impressive, the soundtrack is perfection...everything here is absolutely right. This is everything one could hope for and then some, truly gripping and awesome in every way possible, see this right away and don't think twice, it's brilliant!

Availability:  On DVD

Death Wish 3 (1985)

 4 / 5 Jul '09
Tagline: He's back in New York bringing justice to the streets
Directed by: Michael Winner
Written by: Brian Garfield, Don Jakoby
Actors include: Charles Bronson, Deborah Raffin, Ed Lauter
Genre: Action, Crime, Drama
Length: 92 minutes
Banned: Sweden
Country: USA

Review:
So I almost feel guilty really liking this one because well the first two seem quite serious and dark and awesome and this is entirely different. Oh it's still Paul Kersey finding a friend in a pool of blood then needing to take revenge. This time he stays in his dead friend's apartment and helps the other aged folks in the neighborhood take down the thugs (including Alex Winters!) and stand up for themselves. It's as violent as one could possible imagine, I mean they even give him a rocket launcher for cripes' sake! It's actually so over the top that it is really funny, just when you think gee I hope something will explode or that someone will eat it in a funny way...it happens. It's entirely satisfying for a hilariously awesomely violent romp with nuttin' but killing!

Availability:  On DVD

Delirium (1987) aka Le foto di Gioia aka Gioia's Photograph aka Photo of Gioia aka Photos of Joy aka Delirium: Photo of Gioia

3 / 5 Jul '09
Tagline: N/A
Directed by: Lamberto Bava
Written by: Gianfranco Clerici, Luciano Martino
Actors include: Serena Grandi, Daria Nicolodi, Vanni Corbellini
Genre: Horror, Thriller
Length: 94 minutes
Banned: Nope
Country: Italy

Review:
A rather cheesy late giallo courtesy of Mr. Lamberto Bava. Prepare for loads of cheap nudity, and one girl with huge boobs (Serena Grandi). This 'un also has some creative and interesting deaths that look quite fake but I give kudos for trying some fun ways to kill. The story is about a girl who used to be a hooker that is trying to run a sleazy magazine. Of course a bunch of the models are being murdered that pose in the magazine. Not only that but the killer poses the bodies next to a picture of big boob, so of course she is scrambling to find the murderer. It's not bad considering what a late entry it is, and it's colorful enough to please non-discriminating horror fans. It at least comes together in a package that is as clear as day and it was easy enough to watch, just not classy in any shape way or form.

Availability:  On DVD

Seven Blood Stained Orchids (1972) aka Sette Orchidee Macchiate di Rosso aka Puzzle of the Silver Half Moons aka Sieben Gesichter für die Mörderin aka

4 / 5 Jul '09
Tagline: N/A
Directed by: Umberto Lenzi
Written by: Roberto Gianviti, Paul Hengge
Actors include: Antonion Sabato, Uschi Glas, Pier Paolo Capponi
Genre: Horror, Thriller
Length: 88 minutes
Banned: Nope
Country: Italy

Review:
As far as giallo films go, this is a good one, but it's not quite as memorable as some of the more classic examples. This one has graphic bloody deaths (thanks Lenzi) and surprisingly it seems restrained considering the director but he does do some typical trademark stuff occasionally. The story is about a serial killer who uses interesting deaths and leaves a half moon charm in the hands of their victims. When one of the victims isn't actually dead (but they pretend she is) they start to get the investigation underway. It seems they have a few clues, but will they figure out what's going on before it's too late? This has many of the typical trappings...the gloves, the red herrings and some weird thing that happen that you don't expect to see (ie the cats scene). It's a fun little film that gialli fans should like, and Lenzi fans should enjoy too, definitely a winner!

Availability:  On DVD

In the Folds of the Flesh (1970) aka Nelle pieghe dlla carne aka Las Endemoniadas

3.5 / 5 Jun '09
Tagline: N/A
Directed: Sergio Bergonzelli
Written by: Sergio Bergonzelli, Mario Caiano
Actors include: Eleonara Rossi Drago, Pier Angeli, Fernando Sancho
Genre: Horror, Thriller, Drama
Length: 88 minutes
Banned: Nope
Country: Italy

Review:
This is one weird giallo film...and when I mean weird, I mean sleazy and over the top! The story revolves around a felon who believes he sees a body being buried. When he gets out of jail he tries to blackmail the folks he thinks are responsible. In true giallo fashion there are many weird things going on...casual incest, Nazi flashbacks, weird wigs and more twists than Chubby Checker has! If you are looking for something classy and well shot with a great soundtrack, this isn't the film for you...but if you like strange psychedelic mysteries this is one you won't want to miss. The good news is that most of it will make sense later on so even if you feel you are at the pinnacle of confusion...stick with it!

Availability:  On DVD

Puzzle (1974) aka L'uomo Senza Memoria aka Man Without A Memory

3.5 / 5 Jun '09
Tagline: N/A
Directed by: Duccio Tessari
Written by: Ernesto Gastaldi
Actors include: Senta Berger, Luc Merenda, Umberto Orsini
Genre: Thriller, Horror, Drama
Length: 92 minutes
Banned: Nope
Country: Italy

Review:
Hmm so this may be where they got the idea for "Memento" and "Amateur"! It's a giallo that is based around an amnesiac who seems to have a troubled past. As he is accosted by a stranger who threatens him and soon discovers he has a wife he feels he must reconnect with. It's basically bloodless most of the way through and it feels like an interesting drama with a man trying to recover his past. The deeper into the film you get, the weirder things become and the ending is pretty darned awesome and will pay off for those who came to this on the premise that it was a horror film. Definitely unusual, unexpected and something entirely different from a usually relatively samey genre.

Availability:  Not on DVD as far as I can tell

Death Wish II (1982)

 4.5 / 5 Jun '09
Tagline: First His Wife. Now His Daughter. It's Time To Even The Score
Directed by: Michael Winner
Written by: David Engelbach, Brian Garfield
Actors include: Charles Bronson, Jill Ireland, Vincent Gardenia
Genre: Action
Length: 95 minutes
Banned: Norway
Country: USA

Review:
I loved the first one, and I was shocked to find out that I love this one even more! We catch up with vigilante Paul Kersey as he tries to tend to his poor daughter (who suffered during the last film). He is mugged by some thugs who don't like it when he takes revenge. He doesn't get every last one of them, so they vow revenge. They find his daughter and their housekeeper and follow them home with disasterous result. Shortly Paul is back in action dosing out violent revenge! It really was action packed, tons of shootings and Kersey has nothing to live for anymore so he's more ruthless than ever! He's operating out of a hotel room in order to be close to downtown to find the thugs responsible, and boy is he mad. Definitely a high voltage action film that was enjoyable, filled with death and well I only wish the rest of the series will be as good as this one.

Availability:  On DVD

Pieces (1982) aka Mil Gritos Tiene La Noche

 4.5 / 5 Jun '09
Tagline: You Don't Have To Go To Texas For A Chainsaw Massacre
Directed by: Juan Piquer Simon
Written by: Joe D'Amato, Dick Randall
Actors include: Christopher George, Lynda Day George, Frank Brana
Genre: Horror
Length: 90 minutes
Banned: Nope
Country: USA/Spain/Puerto Rico

Review:
This one takes place on a campus where there is a chainsaw killer (who murdered his Ma and chainsawed her to pieces) on the prowl. He seems to be taking different parts from the victims but what is he doing with them and will he be stopped? It was a fun little bloody number in very poor taste for those who love excessive carnage. What's cool is that although you are guaranteed to be splattered with guts and things, and actually the story holds up too! It's a bit of a whodunnit in a way, and it's even a little creepy. Considering it's kinda riding the coattails of gems like "Texas Chainsaw Massacre" this actually stands up on it's own. Definitely one to seek out, particularly if you think slashers have to be entirely mindless and pointless as this one disproves that those theories.

Availability:  On DVD

Case of the Scorpion's Tail (1971) aka La coda dello Scorpione aka La Cola del Escorpion aka Scorpion's Tail

 4.5 / 5 Jun '09
Tagline: N/A
Directed by: Sergio Martino
Written by: Ernesto Gastaldi, Eduardo Manzanos Brochero
Actors include: George Hilton, Anita Strindberg, Alberto de Mendoza
Genre: Horror, Thriller
Length: 90 minutes
Banned: Nope
Country: Italy

Review:
Hooray for Sergio Martino's gialli films, he has a definitely style that makes his films beautiful to watch, but he's not afraid to go places that some of the others won't go. The plot is sheer giallo, full of interesting turns and red herrings but it's interesting throughout. It's about an investigator and a journalist who is looking into a series of nasty murders that followed a plane crash and insurance money. The story is very well thought out and quite a bit different than any of the other gialli I can think of although it definitely shares many of the classic trappings so it should please genre fans yet offer them something new. This has some intense and cool scenes, some blood and of course some style so this is a definite must see!

Availability:  On DVD

Planet of the Apes (1968)

 4.5 / 5 Jun '09
Tagline: Somewhere in the universe there must be something better than man. In a matter of time, an astronaut will wing through the centuries and find the answer. He may find the most terrifying one of all on the planet where apes are the rulers and man the beast.
Directed by: Franklin J. Schaffner
Written by: Michael Wilson, Rod Serling
Actors include: Charlton Heston, Roddy McDowall, Kim Hunter
Genre: Sci-Fi
Length: 112 minutes
Banned: Nope
Country: USA

Review:
I've always meant to see this but somehow I saw the remake first...this one is much better! It's about a crew from space who end up on this strange planet that seems to be under ape control! Humans don't seem to be able to talk and they are put in cages like animals..it's the apes who are considered intelligent here. Heston finds himself in a position where he has to prove that humanity is smarter than the apes think...but will they listen? Will it be too late? It's really an interesting tale that is yes, over the top...especially Heston's awesome acting and one-liners. It's very entertaining regardless and although it's not the shortest film it feels like a breeze to sit through. Impressive sets and good story make this one of the best sci-fi films I've come across yet, a definite must!

Availability:  On DVD and Blu-Ray

Race with the Devil (1975)

 4.5 / 5 Jun '09
Tagline: If you're going to race with the devil, you've got to be as fast as Hell!
Directed by: Jack Starrett
Written by: Wes Bishop, Lee Frost
Actors include: Peter Fonda, Warren Oates, Loretta Swit
Genre: Thriller, Horror, Action
Length: 88 minutes
Banned: Nope
Country: USA

Review:
To think I'd have never heard of this were it not for my Husband who actually grabbed this film. It's truly thrilling and intense through and through with great characters and actors. It's about two couples who decide to load up their RV and go camping for their vacation. As they are stopped along the way they happen to see some sort of Satanic ritual, and are caught spying. From that moment on it's an exciting chase scene between our couples and the cult. It's completely unexpected and although it's a very straightforward film there are a few surprises along the way. Definitely try to see this, then be captivated throughout the entire film. They don't make many like this...and it's too bad because this was extremely exciting and great in every way.

Availability:  On DVD

House with the Laughing Windows (1976) aka La Casa Dalle Finestre Che Ridono aka The House With Laughing Windows aka House with the Windows That Laugh

 4.5 / 5 Jun '09
Tagline: N/A
Directed by: Pupi Avati
Written by: Antonio Avati
Actors include: Lino Capolicchio, Francesca Marciano, Gianni Cavina
Genre: Thriller, Horror
Length: 110 minutes
Banned: Nope
Country: Italy

Review:
Well first of all prepare to be captivated and confused for most of the movie...but in the best way possible for the ending is awesome...so stick with this film! Our story is about a fellow who is a painting restorer who was called to a strange little town to restore a painting. The fellow who's painting he starts to restore is apparently quite disturbed and our restorer is left investigating this man as clearly something strange is going on. The film is incredibly stylish and fascinating even though it is rather slow until it turns to amazing! It actually gets bloody, it wraps together in a neat little package plus it's really quite surprising. One of the best gialli films I've stumbled upon, even if the title may sound less than enticing...this is a winner!

Availability:  On DVD

The Last Horror Film (1982) aka Fanatic

 3.5 / 5 Jun '09
Tagline: Babes are dying to be in his movie!
Directed by: David Winters
Written by: Judd Hamilton, Tom Klassen
Actors include: Caroline Munro, Joe Spinell, Judd Hamilton
Genre: Horror, Drama
Length: 87 minutes
Banned: Iceland
Country: USA

Review:
I've waited a long time to find a copy of this that wasn't edited (in other words...avoid copies that are titled "Fanatic"), and finally this year this was released uncut! It's in a way a follow up to the classic "Maniac" as Joe Spinell plays a similarly disturbed character in this one, however the two films are most different and you definitely don't have to see one to appreciate the other. If you walk into this expecting a horror movie in the traditional sense, you will likely be unimpressed. This is more a disturbed stalker sort of film in a way. Spinell plays a superfan of an actress called Jana Bates whom he wants to star in his movie. The setting takes place at Cannes Film Festival in the early '80s so the backdrop is fascinating. Also Spinell's acting really must be seen, so few can pull off a character of this calibre! There is some killing here, but it's definitely more for those wanting to see something unusual I'd say. A bit of a let down but in other ways it made up for it's cheapness and shortcomings.

Availability:  On DVD