Dracula Bites The Big Apple (1979)

4 / 5 June '11
Tagline: N/A
Directed by: Richard Wenk
Written by: Fred Olsen
Actors include: Barry Gomolka, Peter Loewy, Steve Rubell
Genre: Horror, Comedy, Musical, Short
Length: 22 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
This is admittedly very campy and silly but with a musical/disco themed Dracula short film in New York from the '70s...what the heck do you expect? Dracula runs out of blood in Transylvannia, so he and Renfield (who looks spun out on something) pack in the coffin and take on New York. It's most certainly a comedy, in fact it really is very funny in parts what with the whole fish out of water scenario. Our story also takes Dracula to Studio 54 because he heard hot blooded folks would be there (har har), but of course he can't get in because he can't dance. It's far from scary, and on a horror front aside from the theme it isn't the most effective but judge it on it's merits alone and I think it's pretty entertaining. I wish there were more quirky little short films from the '70s like this one, definitely a lot of fun indeed. On a side note, this short film helped Richard Wenk fund his full length '80s flick Vamp which I also quite enjoy.

Availability:  Not on DVD but watch on youtube: 

Big Meat Eater (1982)

3.5 / 5  Apr '10
Tagline: Are you on his shopping list?
Directed by: Chris Windsor
Written by: Laurence Keane, Phil Savath
Actors include: George Dawson, Andrew Gillies, Clarence 'Big' Miller
Genre: Sci-Fi, Musical, Comedy
Length: 82 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
This is unlike many other musicals though I suspect the director has seen The Apple and The Rocky Horror Picture Show. It's got a full cast of people who can't sing a lick, and a plot that is out of this world...literally! It's extremely cheap and very uneven as a story but it has some big highlights. It's about a joyful butcher (who reminds me of Buster from Arrested Development) in need of an assistant. Enter Abdullah who happens to have problems with his anger and killing people. The gleefully ignorant Butcher hires on Abdullah who has some hilarious moments, especially when grinding meat by hand. The biggest highlight is a song that sounds like "We Didn't Start The Fire" (though it came out before) only it's filled with funny scientific jargon, I was in hysterics! There is also a plot about toy robots who are interested in the butcher shop because their meat that is dissolved in acid makes good fuel for them (balonium). If only the whole movie could have been that funny I'd have rated it a heck of a lot higher. Still fans of absurd cinema and bizarre musicals need to see this, I can't believe something this odd came out of Canada.

Availability:  On DVD

What's The Matter With Helen? (1968) aka The Box Step

3 / 5 Feb '10
Tagline: N/A
Directed by: Curtis Harrington
Written by: Henry Farrell
Actors Include: Debbie Reynolds, Shelley Winters
Genre: Crime, Drama, Horror, Musical
Length: 141 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
I kind of hoped for more with this as I really like Shelley Winters and well Debbie Reynolds is pretty amusing too. The two play very best friends who's Sons have been arrested for murder, so they decide to flee for a new life. Adelle (Reynolds) is the talented one, she opens her own dance studio for children and seems to have quite a few singing and dancing numbers. Unfortunately we have to watch plenty of children tap dance and sing entire numbers throughout the film (I could have totally done without this). Helen (Winters) is the more religious and timid creature desperate for Adele's friendship though she pretty much lives in a shell. Things are going swimmingly until Adele meets the man of her dreams and plans to marry him, then we are all wondering....what's the matter with Helen? For long periods of the film nothing much happens, I know they are trying to establish the two women's relationships but it's overly boring. Once Helen starts acting strange things definitely pick up and getting interesting but it's almost too little too late. At least parts of this were worthwhile, and it is rather campy which makes it somewhat entertaining even when it's dull. Not the best film by far but this will definitely appeal to some.

Availability:  On DVD as part of a 2fer with "Who Slew Auntie Roo"