Hambuster (2010)

2.5 / 5 Jul '11
Tagline: N/A
Directed by: Paul Alexandre, Maxime Cazaux, Dara Cazamea, Romain Delaunay, Bruno Ortolland
Written by: Paul Alexandre, Maxime Cazaux, Dara Cazamea, Romain Delaunay, Bruno Ortolland
Actors include: N/A
Genre: Comedy, Horror, Animated
Length: 6 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
This is a sorta lamely computer animated short 3D flick about a hamburger gone bad. It was created by 5 students as a graduation project I believe, and when you consider that they did well...I'da passed 'em. A fella goes to take a bite only to have it lick his face, then the burger promptly goes on a chomping spree tearing up a fast food restaurant. It's just not very special and it seems as though not much care went into the making of it. I did appreciate the carnage that takes place during the restaurant massacre (some of the touches there were nice) but the rest of it all seemed rather meh. Not something I'll ever want to see again nor would I really recommend it, but it did give me a craving for a burger.

Availability:  watch it here for free  http://vimeo.com/13526349

X-Men: First Class (2011)

3.5 / 5 Jun '11
Tagline: Witness the origin
Directed by: Matthew Vaughn
Written by: Ashley Miller, Zack Stentz
Actors include: James McAvoy, Michael Fassbender, Jennifer Lawrence
Genre: Sci-Fi, Action, Adventure
Length: 132 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
I wouldn't say I'm a big fan of the series, though I've barely explored it. I saw the first X-Men movie back when it came out, thought it was alright but never bothered with any of the sequels. Luckily for me this is filmed in such a way that seeing the first film was all I really needed. It goes back to the '60s when Charles Xavier and Erik Lensherr were friends and learning to use their powers together. Together they recruit other mutants and start teaching them to use the power within to try to stop a missile crisis that could blow destroy everything. Be prepared for a ton of neat action sequences, some cheesy montages, and of course some neat mutant activity. They also did a rather good job of tying it into the first movie (heck even Wolverine makes a cameo which is the best part of the film) and yet it didn't feel like they were retreading. I did feel it went on a little long, and a bit of trimming from the beginning wouldn't have hurt, but for the most part it was satisfying and it covered a lot of territory. It's made me curious what I've missed with the other sequels, that is for sure.

Availability:  Still in theatres currently

Stake Land (2010)

4 / 5 Jun '11
Tagline: The most dangerous thing is to be alive.
Directed by: Jim Mickle
Written by: Jim Mickle, Nick Damici
Actors include: Nick Damici, Connor Paolo, Kelly McGillis
Genre: Horror
Length: 98 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
Thanks to Dark Sky Films (The House of the Devil) who seem to be trying to revive the modern horror genre single handedly, and thanks to Happywax (Doomgoryums Horror Emporium) for finding this gem and recommending it to me. It's definitely one of the best vampire pictures to have come out in a while, it actually feels more like a zombie film (which I tend to prefer). The set-up involves a teenage boy called Martin (an homage to Romero perhaps?) who's folks are brutally killed by vampire attack. A fellow called "Mister" (Nick Damici) saves Martin and takes him on as a traveling companion looking out for him. Mister has a bit of a dark side, he is rather violent which is helpful when dealing with vampire attacks but sometimes he gets a little carried away with the living (although I approved of his brutality). Along the way they meet several other survivors and help them out along the way of course. It's also pretty interesting because the setting is definitely post-apocalyptic, and the survival element was very well incorporated into the story. It has everything one could want, action, violence, blood and gore as well as good pacing and likeable characters so in other words watch it!

Availability:  on DVD and Blu-Ray
Stake Land [Blu-ray]

Rubber (2010)

4 / 5 May '11
Tagline: Are You Tired of the Expected?
Directed by: Quentin Dupieux
Written by: Quentin Dupieux
Actors include: Stephen Spinella, Wings Hauser, Roxane Mesquida
Genre: Black Comedy, Horror
Length: 82 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
I found this to be instantly engaging and the surrealism was quite charming. The very fact that they managed to make a movie about a tire and made it interesting deserves applause. The tire in question seems to learn that it enjoys running things over, but it has even more fun once it starts exploding heads through some sort of telepathy (seriously). The tire also becomes obsessed with a woman as our story goes on. Don't focus too much on what it's about because it just is and it makes no bones about that. It's a very strange format in that there is a side story with the audience who happens to be watching the tire. It's sort of like an essay or commentary that is going on while the actual story is too, it really adds a unique perspective. The odd thing is, that it is effective as a black comedy, it is effective as a horror film (lots of red stuff) and yet it feels like an art film too. Definitely an inventive and entertaining horror film, thanks so much to Happywax (Doomgoryums Horror Emporium) for the recommendation.

Availability:  On DVD & Blu-Ray

Priest (2011)

3 / 5  May '11 
Tagline:  The War is Eternal. His Mission is Just the Beginning.
Directed by:  Scott Charles Stewart
Written by:  Cory Goodman, Min-Woo Hyung
Actors include:  Paul Bettany, Cam Gigandet, Maggie Q
Genre:  Thriller, Horror, Action, Western
Length:  87 minutes
Banned:  Nope

Review:
Well, this was my first ever 3D movie in the theater, and unfortunately it didn't really utilize this tool very effectively but it did add a nice touch or two.  The particularly stellar part was the Gothic animation in the beginning sequences, it's too bad they didn't use more of this throughout the film.  What they did use were CGI vampires that resembled Marilyn Manson, ridiculously laughable script ("Kill 'Em All") and some of the most implausible action sequences (oh I'm talking about you stones thrown into the air that were used as steps) I think I've ever seen.  Conceptually it's decent enough, it's about a war that occurred between humanity and vampires and Priests were the saviors of humans.  They have since disbarred and been outcast in society and must work demeaning tasks.  The vampires were supposedly vanquished (note I said "supposedly") which leads us to our next problem.  A family are brutalized and a daughter Lucy held captive by vampires, of course the way this works is that a Priest is related to her.  He must leave his Priesthood in order to kick some butt and save Lucy with a little help from a fella called Hicks.  Anyhow it is filled with action...and if you like scenes were people glide around on bikes in the sand (okay so I thought it was snow because I'm an idiot) for long stretches...you will love this movie.  There were at least a few redeeming qualities to this, the visuals were striking and the plot was okay.  Maybe not exactly my cup-o-tea but not worth writing off entirely.

Availability:  Still in theaters

Insidious (2010)

2.5 / 5 Apr '11
Tagline: It's not the House thats Haunted.
Directed by: James Wan
Written by: Leigh Whannell
Actors include: Patrick Wilson, Rose Byrne, Ty Simpkins
Genre: Horror, Fantasy, Thriller
Length: 103 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
I really did have high hopes for this 'un and I wanted to like it...I truly did. The plot (although derrived heavily from Poltergeist) is a relatively interesting one. A young couple move into a house with their two boys and one of the boys goes into some sort of unmedically explainable coma. Also ghosts start appearing and making Mom (Rose Byrne) appear crazy, but when they move the ghosts seem to follow! Of course they have to start calling in the stereotypical Paranormal experts to come up with the real reason for the coma. It is filled with Lewton Buses and it does go for the jolt for the viewer (it's just not something that I find works the best on me). Also the ghosts reminded me of Darth Maul, Ozzy, and of course some characters from the "Black Hole Sun" video which made me giggle more than it should have. It definitely seems like people are split on this one so I say see it and decide for yourself, it's effective for a particular sort of scare...I just wish I weren't immune.

Availability:  Still in theatres but I'm sure DVD and Blu-Ray will follow

The Wolfman (2010)

3.5 / 5 Feb '11
Tagline: When the moon is full the legend comes to life
Directed by: Joe Johnston
Written by: Andrew Kevin Walker, David Self
Actors include: Benicio Del Toro, Anthony Hopkins, Emily Blunt
Genre: Horror, Drama, Thriller
Length: 103 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
I actually thought this was better than I had expected, however it wasn't perfect. I appreciated the throwback to the style of the early Universal monster films, and they really went out of their way to make a visually appealing and detailed setting for the film. The cast was quite good as well really, and the story seemed true enough to form I think. A man's (Benicio Del Toro) brother is savagely killed, so he seeks the truth behind the killing. Of course he finds there is werewolf activity...only a little too late. I think the biggest issue with the movie was the CGI effects which majorly cheesed it up wherever they were involved. It could have been really excellent without honestly and that was disappointing. Still considering they are just reworking old material they managed to make an entertaining and fast paced film. I would recommend this however this is far from the best film about the topic.

Availability:  On Blu-Ray & DVD

A Serbian Film (2010) aka Srpski Film

4.5 / 5 Jan '11
Tagline: N/A
Directed by: Srdjan Spasojevic
Written by: Aleksandar Radivojevic, Srdjan Spasojevic
Actors include: Srdjan Todorovic, Sergej Trifunovic, Jelena Gavrilovic
Genre: Horror, Drama
Length: 103 minutes
Banned: Australia

Review:
Well, this is the sort of film that seriously succeeds in being a disturbing horror film in nearly every sense of the word. It's got something to offend everyone, and it made me feel very uneasy and uncomfortable. It's difficult to watch because of subject matter, but since it's so well made and well acted it's almost more shocking. It's a film about a retired Porn actor called Milos who was known in the business for being able to get himself hard immediately. He needs money for his Wife and Son so he somewhat reluctantly signs on to do a mysterious art film. The thing is, they won't tell him what he's filming, he is just to show up and not ask questions. This will tackle just about any taboo you can think of, and it's stunningly horrifying. I did see "what happened" coming, it wasn't too surprising that way, but it was still mesmerizing none the less. I can't really "recommend" this, but if you can handle nearly anything in film and want to be disturbed you may want to see this one, I think it takes the cake.

Availability:  On Blu-Ray & DVD

Video Nasties: Moral Panic, Censorship & Videotape (2010)

3 / 5 Jan '11
Tagline: To avoid moral panic keep repeating: "They were only movies, only movies, only movies, only movies..."
Directed by: Jake West
Written by: N/A
Actors include: Julian Petley, Marc Morris, Andy Nyman
Genre: Documentary, Horror
Length: 72 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
Well perhaps it's because I've studied the Nasties closely and been obsessed with them for such a long time that I found this to be rather dull. I give credit for at least showing a few seconds from each "Nasty" at the very beginning of the show, but from then on it's more about the effect it had on retailers. This is rather interesting and they raise some good points, but it's all stuff I've heard before. Same about how Mary Whitehouse actually unknowingly helped promote all of these pictures as she went on the warpath and was a driving force in banning them. Then people wanted the list and tried to watch stuff from it because of course they weren't supposed to. The phenomenon is quite interesting and if you know nothing about it, sure give this a watch. I was bothered by the fact that they didn't go into the content of the films very much, nor did they mention how The Funhouse was banned mistakenly for having the same name as another film. They do mention the Cannibal films and I Spit on Your Grave a few times but some more explanation would have been nice. Still it's better than nothing and I did learn a few tidbits from it.

Availability:  On DVD in the UK

A History Of Horror With Mark Gatiss (2010) BBC4

4 / 5 Oct '10
Tagline: N/A
Directed by: N/A
Written by: N/A
Actors include: Mark Gatiss, John Carpenter, Barbara Steele
Genre: Horror Documentary
Length: 3 hours (3 one hour episodes)
Banned: Nope

Review:
Well this Mark Gatiss is someone who shares many of the same horror opinions I do, so I found this particular series quite a bit of fun to watch though it didn't have much that I didn't already know to offer. The first episode focuses mainly on the '30s to the '50s, really the beginnings of American and British horror (it completely avoids most other films for some reason, the gaping hole being the German films of the time). It goes into Val Lewton (who for some reason Carpenter disses big time...I like Lewton), Lon Chaney and a brief summery of his horror works, James Whale and of course the Universal Monster films. The second episode focuses on the Hammer Horror age with close attention to that studio, Christopher Lee and Peter Cushing and even into some Amicus anthologies that I love and even a Tigon production (The Blood on Satan's Claw). It definitely mainly focuses in on the UK but that is where most of the action was at that time. The third portion goes into slashers like Psycho, The Texas Chain Saw Massacre and the like, but it stops right after Halloween. Also since this set of episodes is so British centric I was surprised there was no mention of Pete Walker. At least they tried to talk to several people involved, and Mark takes us to several of the locations and throws in little tidbits here and there too. It's not comprehensive...it is just his favorite films and some of the details within so yes many areas are completely untouched but what it does cover is interesting and informative. Mark is a likeable host though where he and I disagree is that I think there is merit in the '80s slashers and so forth but heck I at least like every film I've seen mentioned on the list (and I'd seen most of them). Worthy of a viewing for fans of the genre, but if you like the new stuff this might have nothing to offer you.

Availability:  Airs on BBC4 from time to time

A Nightmare On Elm Street (2010)

2 / 5 Oct '10
Tagline: Never Sleep Again
Directed by: Samuel Bayer
Written by: Wesley Strick
Actors include: Jackie Earle Haley, Kyle Gallner, Rooney Mara
Genre: Horror, Fantasy
Length: 95 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
Well, I'm a huge fan of the original series, yet I was hesitant about watching this remake perhaps because most are dreadful. Now I'll give this credit for being better than the Friday the 13th remake but that's about the nicest thing I can say. Jackie Earle Haley was a terrible choice for Freddy and the make-up they've used makes him look like he was caught in a fire with a Planet Of The Apes mask on. They've also removed the clever one-liners and style that make original Freddy so darned entertaining. This one is just mad and speaks directly (occasionally saying something moronic) and doesn't have a sense of humor at all. Freddy is still a dream menace on a new group of teens (who are rather flavorless kill props), the parents are still covering up what really happened and so forth. They at least kept relatively true to what Freddy is able to do. It's just so many unbelievably stupid things like a fellow falling asleep during a relay swim race? It's definitely not scary though they repeatedly try to use the sudden loud noise effect to create jumps...but it doesn't work either. Nothing has been gained by this remake at all, heck it nearly directly lifted scenes from the original only making them worse (the Tina/Chris) death? I suppose I imagined it would be worse than it was but I still think it was an utter waste of time an energy for everyone concerned.

Availability: On DVD & Blu-Ray