The Mafu Cage (1978) aka Deviant aka Don't Ring The Doorbell aka My Sister, My Love aka The Cage

3.5 / 5 Jun '11
Tagline: A Psychological Thriller
Directed by: Karen Arthur
Written by: Don Chastain, Éric Wesphal
Actors include: Lee Grant, Carol Kane, Will Geer
Genre: Drama, Exploitation, Horror
Length: 102 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
This is one odd duck of a film, it's not going to be for everyone but to select few it should be entertaining. The story is originally from a play which is somewhat evident by the claustrophobic feel to the film. The film takes place in a bizarre home where two sisters live together. Ellen (Lee Grant) is the normal sister who vows to look after Cissy (Carol Kane) when their Father dies. Cissy has problems to put it lightly, she was in Africa apparently and is rather "wild" living in their jungle like abode with a pet Monkey called Mafu (who is kept in a cage, hence the title). Cissy is into drawing a picture of Mafu, but when the picture is finished look out! The story has weird themes of incest, mental illness, manipulation and all kinds of good exploitation like stuff. Considering all that is going on it somehow manages to refrain from being too sleazy and although it is a bit slow to start it does keep a decent momentum. It's more like a weird drama rather than an actual horror film but it definitely has elements from the genre. Rather twisted and strange most definitely and it's quite something to see Kane's performance, worth it for fans of weirdness.

Availability:  On DVD

Thirst (1979)

3.5 / 5 Jun '11
Tagline: Surrender to an Unholy, Insatiable Evil.
Directed by: Rod Hardy
Written by: John Pinkney
Actors include: Chantal Contouri, Shirley Cameron, Max Phipps
Genre: Horror, Sci-Fi
Length: 93 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
Although this isn't the fastest paced flick, nor is it the bloodiest flick ever it does have some unique qualities that keep it from biting. It's an Australian vampire picture from the '70s (which isn't very common), and there is a definite gothic feel to it. The plot is about a young woman called Kate (Chantal Contouri) who is kidnapped by a strange blood cult. Oh did I mention that Kate happens to be the direct descendent of Countess Elizabeth Bathory? What is so interesting is this blood cult I mentioned, see they have some sort of human cow factory thing set-up. Folks wander around in a daze like mindless zombies before being chosen to be drained of blood which goes into milk cartons for mass distribution. Kind of a neat idea on the 'ole blood trade/vampirism thing right? It is a shame that with such a good idea they couldn't have made a more thrilling movie. It just sort of explains itself and then the last half is pretty boring and forced feeling plus some more historical detail would have been nice. It also could have used more blood (there is very little actual horror in this, more conceptual I guess), and maybe a twist could have helped. Oh well as it is, it's still worth checking out, I found it pretty interesting, it just could have used some tweaking is all.

Availability:  On DVD

A Stranger Is Watching (1982)

2.5 / 5 Feb '11
Tagline: Beneath New York's Grand Central Station, a killer can hide, victims can disappear... and a million witnesses will never know it happened.
Directed by: Sean S. Cunningham
Written by: Mary Higgins Clark, Earl Mac Rauch
Actors include: Kate Mulgrew, Rip Torn, James Naughton
Genre: Thriller, Horror
Length: 92 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
I've actually enjoyed a few Sean S. Cunningham but this is definitely not one of them. I was surprised how tame it was, it felt like a movie of the week thriller involving a kidnapping. Now yes, towards the end we get a little knifey action but it's far too little too late. The plot is about a young girl who watches her Mom get raped and murdered. The it jumps to the future and she and Dad's current girlfriend (Kate Mulgrew) are kidnapped by the Man (Rip Torn) who killed Ma. From there it's a ransom situation with a "daring" escape as they are imprisoned below Grand Central Station with Bums (er homeless) galore. It should have been way more entertaining than it was, and perhaps if I had found that little girl less irritating I might have cared what happened to everyone. Oh well, certainly not a satisfying horror film or thriller really but it could have been worse.

Availability:  On DVD

Weekend Of Terror (1970)

2.5 / 5 Jan '11
Tagline: N/A
Directed by: Jud Taylor
Written by: Lionel E. Siegel
Actors Include: Robert Conrad, Carol Linley, Lee Majors
Genre: Thriller, Horror
Length: 74 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
This was a rarely seen made-for-tv "thriller" involving a kidnapping gone wrong. It's very light weight and it was rather cheesy considering what they could have made from the plot. Some kidnappers capture a girl, but accidentally she dies during an attack. They then end up kidnapping a similar looking girl and two nuns and holding them hostage. See they need to trick the fellow into paying the ransom and then they can make a getaway before they realize they were given the wrong girl. It's tolerable but certainly missing pizzazz or danger really, it never gets tense or even that interesting, you pretty much know exactly what is going to happen throughout. Oh well there are definitely worse films you could be stuck watching, I just wouldn't run out and try to find this one if I were you.

Availability:  Not on DVD currently

Schoolgirls In Chains (1973) aka Abducted

2.5 / 5 Oct '10
Tagline: See It At Your Own Risk!
Directed by: Donald M. Jones
Written by: Donald M. Jones
Actors include: Gary Kent, John Parker, Stafford Morgan
Genre: Horror, Exploitation
Length: 86 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
Meh, I kind of thought this would be better than it was, it's certainly a low budget exploitation film but it's not really as sleazy as I had anticipated. Two redneck moron brothers kidnap young ladies under the supervision of crazy Ma and keep them prisoner in the basement. They play games with the women that often lead to rape and torture etc and yes parts are a bit graphic but it all seemed so laughably poorly acted that it was hard to care or sympathize with anyone. It was dull enough that I felt like I was locked in their basement dying to get out. This is filled with misogyny and various things to offend various people but really it's nothing I haven't seen before more effectively made. There are a few things I suppose that were unique to this film like topless leap frog, and a needle in the rump of one of the girls, but if you like seeing women mistreated Bloodsucking Freaks is a far more entertaining venture.

Availability:  On DVD

Faceless (1987)

4 / 5 Aug '10
Tagline: Come Face To Face With Evil
Directed by: Jesus Franco
Written by: Rene Chateau
Actors include: Helmut Berger, Brigitte Lahaie, Telly Savalas
Genre: Horror
Length: 98 minutes
Banned: Canada

Review:
Well this is a pretty darned entertaining Eurosleaze take on the story Les yeux sans visage [Eyes Without a Face], and really it's probably the best Jesús Franco film I've seen. It's from the late '80s so expect lots of colors, cheesy music and so forth but really they did do a relatively good job of making this straightforward. The plot is about a plastic surgeon who improperly fixed a Woman's face, so she throws acid on the face of his sister, horribly disfiguring her. He feels guilt and wants to give her back her face so along with his creepy Nurse Nathalie (Brigitte Lahaie they kidnap models with the intent of performing a face transplant. It's as gory as heck and actually pretty darned hilarious too, really they did a good job with the effects and everything considering it was likely straight-to-video. It also does have a bunch of people you are likely to recognize in the cast including Anton Diffring and Telly Savalas as an added bonus as well. Recommended for those who like gruesome trash, although it's certainly not the classic the film it's aping is, it's still worthwhile.

Availability:  On DVD

Three Extremes (2002) aka Three Extremes 2 aka Saam Gaang aka Three

2.5 / 5 May '10
Tagline: When two just ain't enough!
Directed by: Peter Chan, Ji-woon Kim, Nonzee Nimibutr
Written by: Teddy Chan, Matt Chow
Actors include: Hye-su Kim, Bo-seok Jeong, Suwinit Panjamawat
Genre: Horror
Length: 129 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
So the scoop is that this 3 Extremes film was released on DVD as 3 Extremes 2 despite the fact that it is actually volume 1. The sequel was more popular and therefore I believe was released as volume 1 instead of 2. Now that I've been super confusing, let me just say that the other 3 Extremes tales I really enjoyed each of them, quite fascinating. This time I found them rather dull and derivative, even when some were trying to be artsy it just seemed like drawing out the obvious. The first tale was about a woman who wakes up without memory also we have a husband who can't remember why his woman left him. The wandering woman calls a number on her dry cleaning bill (the only thing she has on her) and her husband finds a bloodied bag at his place. It's very confusingly told but at the same time it seems obvious what is going on despite all of the nonsense. It's got a bit of gore but it's very unsatisfying. The second tale is much like the film Dolls only a lot less amusing. This time it's traditional oriental dolls who are coming to life and they seem to cause voodoo like damage on folks. It's not as fun as it sounds and it goes on for way too long. The last story is the most interesting, a fellow has a dead wife in the tub who he believes is real. He bathes her and talks to her as though she's coming back to life and she speaks to him in his mind. When a neighbor pops by to look for his missing son he ends up tied to a chair and kept hostage waiting for the dead wife to revive herself. None of the stories were nearly as interesting as the other film, none were as shocking nor were the stories as clear. I do recommend seeking out the 2004 film called Three Extremes but this one I thought was a rather big dud...and over two hours long to boot.

Availability:  On DVD

Mother's Day (1980)

3 / 5 Apr '10
Tagline: If you go down to the woods today
Directed by: Charles Kaufman
Written by: Warren Leight, Charles Kaufman
Actors include: Nancy Hendrickson, Deborah Luce, Tiana Pierce
Genre: Horror, Comedy
Length: 90 minutes
Banned: Australia

Review:
Hmm, well if you've seen Troma films before then you know the sort of cheapness and ineptitude one is in for. This time it appears that Troma's Charles Kaufman saw I Spit on Your Grave [Day of the Woman] and decided to make their own version. This is a tale about three bff's who have decided to go camping in a remote area for their annual getaway. After watching plenty of their ridiculous flashbacks and hearing tons of giggling and in-jokes they are carried away in their sleeping bags. Two inbred seeming thugs have kidnapped the girls in order to please Mama, she gives the orders on who to torment first. Well after several escape attempts the remaining girls decide to get revenge and well this is the best part of the film. It's gory, they use unusual methods of retaliation (Draino and axe to the crotch anyone?) and it's pretty entertaining really. The thing is it's all done in such a joking style that it's impossible to be disturbed by which seems to be the ultimate goal of the movie. It fails more than it succeeds but yet there are a few moments that fans of this sort of thing should appreciate. I liked it a teaspoon better than Les mémés cannibales [Rabid Grannies] but Bloodsucking Freaks will always be the best Troma film I've seen. Thanks to kevdog for suggesting I give this a whirl.

Availability:  On DVD

And Soon The Darkness (1970)

4.5 / 5 Jan '10
Tagline: N/A
Directed by: Robert Fuest
Written by: Brian Clemens, Terry Nation
Actors include: Pamela Franklin, Michele Dotrice, Sandor Eles
Genre: Thriller, Horror
Length: 99 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
This is one film that actually gave me the creeps, it felt real and they did a perfect job of giving off that vibe of alienation and horror. The story is about two young British girls (Jane & Cathy) bicycling through the back areas of France neither of which are fluent in French. After the girls get in a squabble Jane takes off and leaves Cathy suntanning out in the woods. She decides to sit at a roadside cafe and wait until Cathy catches up. After waiting quite a while she decides to bike back to try to find her friend, but she isn't there. Only a few random items are left as a reminder that they were ever there. A ways back a Fellow was watching them, could he have taken Cathy? Jane will stop at nothing to find out, and it's one frightening ride to say the least. I've heard some complain that many of the characters speak in French (untranslated) but the thing is, that's how the girls would have felt. I can only pick out a word or two of French but it was enough to know that something was terribly wrong. I was surprised just how horrific this one actually was, though it is rather slow moving at first (but not in a bad way, it just builds into a doomy tense situation). Recommended highly, this was a real treasure, thanks to Infofreak for recommending this one to me, it's frightening!

Availability:  On DVD but OOP

Blind Beast (1969) aka Moju aka Warehouse

4.5 / 5 Nov '09
Tagline: N/A
Directed by: Yasuzo Masumura
Written by: Rampo Edogawa, Yoshio Shirasaka
Actors include: Eiji Funakoshi, Mako Midori, Noriko Sengoku
Genre: Drama, Horror
Length: 86 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:

What a grotesquely fascinating and appaling film! It's about a blind sculpter who kidnaps a gorgeous model to pose for his newest innovation. Sculptures for the blind, yeah it doesn't make a ton of sense, but that is far from the point. Blind guy's Mom actually helps with this imprisonment (anything for Jr), and the model kicks and screams and tries to use cunning to escape. After a while she beings to co-operate and that's where things get super disturbing and freaky. This had to have been inspiration for the Guinea Pig series and several other pleasure as pain pictures. What really stands out here is actually the elaborate art studio that the model is contained in. I don't want to ruin anything but it's worth it just to see this creepy room, the set designers deserve awards seriously! As demented as this tale is there seems to be a greater message here, it's actually rather artistic and shocking at the same time. It give the viewer the feeling that we too are wound up in this insane little world and trapped in the crazy room. It's really twisted, but I'm sure those who like things twisted will fall madly for this one.

Availability:  On DVD