Crowhaven Farm (1974)

3 / 5 Mar '11
Tagline: A chilling tale of vengeance from beyond the grave.
Directed by: Walter Grauman
Written by: John McGreevey
Actors include: Hope Lange, Lloyd Bochner, Paul Burke
Genre: Thriller, Horror, Drama
Length: 74 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
This is a made-for-tv film and it truly does feel like one, it's very tame and talky but it's entertaining enough to get to the end of at least. Hope Lange plays Maggie Porter, a Woman who has just inherited Crowhaven Farm. She reluctantly goes there with her Husband Ben and she starts feeling deja vu. She also hears crying out in the woods and suffers from visions of witches which causes trouble with She and Ben. They couldn't conceive so when a 10 year old girl called Jennifer ends up in their care they decide to take her in. Something doesn't seem quite right with her, she seems rather fond of Ben but not so much of Maggie. Things get stranger still when Maggie learns that she is finally pregnant. The actors actually do a very fine job, and they are the real reason to bother with this one. Otherwise it's a bit mundane and predictable but it's not all that bad either. Not frightening but they at least provided a reasonable story. Not the worst of it's kind, but not the best either, worth watching on tv one day perhaps.

Availability:  On DVD

A Cold Night's Death (1973)

4.5 / 5 Jan '11
Tagline: Michael C. Gwynne
Directed by: Jerrold Freedman
Written by: Christopher Knopf
Actors include: Robert Culp, Eli Wallach
Genre: Sci-Fi, Horror, Drama
Length: 74 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
Such a clever little well paced sci-fi thriller involving a scientist who studied monkeys in a remote snowy location. He stopped responding to calls so two more scientists (Robert Culp and Eli Wallach) have come in to take over the research and find out what happened to him. They find him frozen solid with a look of horror on his face and the window open, the monkeys are cold and starving and unhappy. As they settle into their posts some freaky things start happening and soon they can't help but wonder if they will suffer the same fate. It's really well made, it's very engaging and it's really short, sure it isn't graphic and gross or anything like that but a good story goes a long way and it makes a good point while it's at it too. It's also rather well filmed, well acted and darn it one of the best made-for-tv movies I've come across, it's just a shame a proper nice release has never happened for this film, it deserves it. Try to seek this one out, it's well worth your time.

Availability:  Currently unavailable though people appear to be selling bootleg DVDs

Weekend Of Terror (1970)

2.5 / 5 Jan '11
Tagline: N/A
Directed by: Jud Taylor
Written by: Lionel E. Siegel
Actors Include: Robert Conrad, Carol Linley, Lee Majors
Genre: Thriller, Horror
Length: 74 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
This was a rarely seen made-for-tv "thriller" involving a kidnapping gone wrong. It's very light weight and it was rather cheesy considering what they could have made from the plot. Some kidnappers capture a girl, but accidentally she dies during an attack. They then end up kidnapping a similar looking girl and two nuns and holding them hostage. See they need to trick the fellow into paying the ransom and then they can make a getaway before they realize they were given the wrong girl. It's tolerable but certainly missing pizzazz or danger really, it never gets tense or even that interesting, you pretty much know exactly what is going to happen throughout. Oh well there are definitely worse films you could be stuck watching, I just wouldn't run out and try to find this one if I were you.

Availability:  Not on DVD currently

Home For The Holidays (1972)

3 / 5 Dec '10
Tagline: N/A
Directed by: John Llewellyn Moxey
Written by: Joseph Stefano
Actors include: Jessica Walter, Sally Field, Julie Harris
Genre: Horror, Mystery
Length: 73 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
An impressive cast and reasonable (though unsurprising) ending make this tolerable, but the wooden dialogue and the fact that they tried to cram too much into a tv movie work against it. The plot is about a sickly Father and his Daughter Alex (Eleanor Parker) who suspect his new Wife is poisoning him. They call all of his other daughters home to assist even though they aren't too eager. See their Mother committed suicide but they believe their Father pushed her to it for the most part so they aren't too eager to forgive. Daughter Christine (a young Sally Field) is the young sweet one, Jessica Walter is hilariously over the top as the alcoholic pill popping sister Frederica, and Jill Haworth plays the sister of many failed marriages Joanna. Step mom Elizabeth (Julie Harris) seems rather evil, and when the daughters start getting knocked off could she be responsible? It's a silly little murder mystery that is low on the murder scale (at one point someone is tapped with a pitchfork and dies...how does that work exactly?) that takes place over the holidays. There are definitely worse made-for-tv movies but there are better ones also.

Availability:  Not currently on DVD

Scream Pretty Peggy (1973)

4 / 5 Nov '10
Tagline: N/A
Directed by: Gordon Hessler
Written by: Jimmy Sangster, Arthur Hoff
Actors include: Ted Bessell, Bette Davis, Sian Barbara Allen
Genre: Horror, Thriller
Length: 73 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
Pretty darned entertaining although entirely derivative of two movies specifically A Bucket of Blood and Psycho but it's still good fun. The story is about a girl whom they call pretty Peggy (though I think that's quite an exaggeration), she needs a job and is interested in sculpture. When she finds a low paying house cleaning job working for a semi-famous sculptor named Jeffrey and his unusual elderly Mother (Bette Davis playing that role she plays in horror films). Peggy is desperately throwing herself at Jeffrey and eagerly trying to please the family, but his Mother keeps trying to get her to quit. Peggy soon starts to suspect something isn't quite right when she sees someone moving around in the forbidden rooms over the garage. Also when a Man turns up looking for his missing daughter who used to work for the family, she gets suspicious. It's pretty satisfying even if quite predictable, but for a made-for-tv movie it's pretty stellar.

Availability:  On DVD but I'm not sure how common it is

How Awful About Allan (1970)

2 / 5 Aug '10
Tagline: N/A
Directed by: Curtis Harrington
Written by: Henry Farrell
Actors include: Anthony Perkins, Julie Harris, Joan Hackett
Genre: Thriller, Drama, Horror
Length: 73 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
Talk about being underwhelmed, I mean one would think the combination of Curtis Harrington, Aaron Spelling and Anthony Perkins would spell success but instead it spells as boring as hell. Perkins plays Allan, a fellow who feels partially responsible for an accidental fire that kills his Father and scars his Sister. Allan even goes temporarily blind from the incident because of stress I think is the explanation (that makes no sense). Allan is finally released from the asylum to his Sister's care, only she doesn't seem the most happy to have him there. She's just looking for an excuse to get rid of him he figures. Matters aren't made any better by a mysterious boarder who is staying at their place. Allan thinks this boarder is trying to kill him, and seems to appear rather insane. It's a made-for-tv movie and mercifully short but still it felt like nothing ever happened until the very end and by that point I didn't really care. Talk about underwhelming clap trap, it just seemed lazy and uninteresting, it's too bad because I think this could have made for a decent film if some major changes occured.

Availability:  On DVD

The Plumber (1979) aka The Mad Plumber

4 / 5 Aug '10
Tagline: The Australian New Wave Has Come
Directed by: Peter Weir
Written by: Peter Weir
Actors include: Judy Morris, Ivar Kants, Robert Coleby
Genre: Thriller, Horror
Length: 77 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
So it would appear that The Cable Guy was entirely ripped off from this one. The big difference being that Jim Carrey in his film was just obnoxious, the plumber in this film was disturbing. A couple are adjusting to their relatively new apartment and their new situation (the wife has decided to stay home and study for a bit while the husband works). When the wife is home alone she gets a knock on her door from the plumber, he just needs to check her pipes you see. Next thing you know he's claiming the pipes are rotted and need to be replaced. Before long he's mentally tormenting her in her own home and the bathroom has turned into total destruction. He's writing song lyrics in her shower and performing in her bathroom, watching her change and various other creepy things. Just watching him interact with her is extremely uncomfortable. It's actually a relatively well made film and it was really short (77 minutes) but originally it was shot for tv. Still it packs quite a punch, and well it would make most people think before answering the door to a plumber!

Availability:  On DVD as a bonus when you buy:

Night Of Fear (1972)

4 / 5 Feb '10
Tagline: Hunted and Trapped, Her Nightmare Is Just Beginning!
Directed by: Terry Bourke
Written by: Terry Bourke
Actors include: Norman Yemm, Carla Hoogeveen, Mike Doorsey
Genre: Horror
Length: 54 minutes
Banned: Australia

Review:
This was actually a really cool discovery from Australia, this was meant to be the pilot episode for a 12 part tv series called "Fright". The problem was, they deemed this episode too gory for airing and it was banned even in Australia and the show never stood a chance. Consider that this was made in 1972 and it predates The Texas Chain Saw Massacre by two years it's actually impressively fresh. After a young blonde woman (who even somewhat resembles Marilyn Burns) is basically tricked off the road by a vicious disgusting killer. It's mainly one big chase scene as she fights for survival against impossible odds and even finds herself in his dirty disgusting shack (that is rather similar to Leatherfaces). It's really rather exciting and disturbingly serious and to the point (at under an hour run time) and really it is one of the more shocking made-for-tv things I've ever seen. I'm amazed this isn't mentioned more, very cool and if there were more in the series I'd make a point to find them.

Availability:  I don't believe this is on DVD

A Taste Of Evil (1971)

3 / 5 Jan '10
Tagline: N/A
Directed by: John Llewellyn Moxey
Written by: Jimmy Sangster
Actors include: Barbara Stanwyck, Roddy McDowall, Barbara Parkins
Genre: Thriller, Horror
Length: 73 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
Considering this was a '70s made-for-tv movie that was written by Jimmy Sangster and produced by Aaron Spelling productions I thought this would be a winner! It's not, in fact it's a rehash of so many films seen previously and this particular retelling is very dry. It's about a young girl who is raped, then put in an asylum because she's in a catatonic state and has sever trauma from the accident. We catch up with her as she's coming home to stay, though she doesn't seem particularly well. See she keeps seeing her Stepfather dead in various places which is tormenting her to say the least. She also has an over-the-top nutty Mother (Barbara Stanwyck) does provide some campy laughter but not a heck of a lot else. I don't want to give more away in case you do want to watch this but let's just say I was underwhelmed. It did have a tidy conclusion and it made clear sense at least!

Availability:  Currently unavailable anywhere

Isn't It Shocking (1973)

3 / 5 Dec '09
Tagline: N/A
Directed by: John Badham
Written by: Lane Slate
Actors include: Alan Alda, Louise Lasser, Edmond O'Brien
Genre: Horror
Length: 73 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
I hate to say that I found this to be rather dull but well the truth is just that. The premise, pretty cool someone is shocking the old folks...appropriate title to say the least. The town Sheriff (Alan Alda) goes about in a slow manner trying to solve the crimes and talking to nearly everyone in town...yawn! Oh and terrible as this is gonna sound, they are old people...death isn't far away at any rate! It completely lacks excitement, you really don't see many deaths so on a horror and thriller front it disappoints. It does have a ton of talking some weak attempts at humor though if you like the characters you will get more out of this. I just felt like I was stuck with 70 minutes of small talk, and about 3 minutes of anything actually happening. I should point out that this was a made-for-tv movie from ABC and often I do enjoy this sort of thing but I really found this 'un to be a big let down.

Availability:  Currently Unavailable, all DVDs seem to be bootlegs

The Signalman (1976)

4.5 / 5 Dec '09
Tagline: N/A
Directed by: Lawrence Gordon Clark
Written by: Charles Dickens, Andrew Davies
Actors include: Denholm Elliott, Bernard Lloyd
Genre: Horror, Drama
Length: 37 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
Part of the UK's A Ghost Story For Christmas series and likely the best story of the lot (though I've only ever seen one other that was also quite good). It's a short period piece but it packs a nice little punch. We follow around a Signalman (bet you wouldn't have guessed that) who seems to be haunted by an image that appears when a disaster happens. This all started after he watched a nasty crash between two trains in a tunnel. He meets a friendly fellow and the two talk about life, work and become friends. It's more than just that though as the dreary ominous atmosphere builds into quite a wonderful flick. When you consider this will only take a little more than a half hour of your time and it's probably the best Christmas ghost story how could one say no?

Availability:  Currently Unavailable

Gargoyles (1972)

3.5 / 5 Dec '09
Tagline: They're coming for you!
Directed by: Bill L. Norton
Written by: Elinor Karpf, Steven Karpf
Actors include: Cornel Wilde, Jennifer Salt, Grayson Hall
Genre: Horror, Fantasy
Length: 74 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
This was unique in many ways as well I can't think of another horror picture about gargoyles, particularly considering this was a made-for-tv movie. Stephen King named this as one of his favorites, which is actually somewhat surprising really. See it starts out amazingly...it's creepy, there is a skeleton from a gargoyle that looks rather real. The old Man who found it was telling his story to our main characters (a Man and his inappropriately dressed at all times daughter) when suddenly the roof of his shack crashes in and flapping noises are heard in the air. As the Man and his daughter try to escape a live gargoyle attacks their car (seriously exciting stuff) but then it gets beyond stupid. First of all I need to mention that the gargoyle effects are friggin' terrible...some of the worst I've seen. They resemble the Creature from the Black Lagoon only cheaper and more plastic looking. Oh and did I mention that they talk and read books...yes I mean the gargoyles. I really wish it had stayed with it's exciting first half into an exciting conclusion. Instead it was laughable, sad and even boring...I was seriously dying for the 74 minutes to be up! It's just too bad because it seems like so much more could have been done with this one, but as is still worth a gander.

Availability:  On DVD

Night Strangler (1973)

4.5 / 5 Dec '09
Tagline: N/A
Directed by: Dan Curtis
Written by: Richard Matheson, Jeffrey Grant Rice
Actors include: Darren McGavin, Simon Oakland, Jo Ann Pflug
Genre: Horror
Length: 90 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
Y'Know, for tv movies the Kolchak are some of the most fun, and although I'm in the minority with my opinion, I preferred this one to The Night Stalker by a small sliver. This one is about a rash of killings that happen every twenty-one years that leaves the victim's bloodless. It also shows traces of dead flesh on the victims and the killer has been described as both handsome and hideous! Kolchak of course is trying to figure out what's going on and when he gets his finger on the pulse of the mystery, nobody wants to believe him! Just like in the other tv-movie he comes within a smidgen of losing his job of course but that's just Kolchak's wacky ways. It's very well paced, interesting and it keeps you guessing up until the time is just so. I know after watching the two movies that I'm going to love the tv series. Definitely recommended especially if you enjoyed the other film!

Availability:  On DVD as part of a 2fer with "The Night Stalker"

The Norliss Tapes (1973)

3 / 5 Nov '09
Tagline: N/A
Directed by: Dan Curtis
Written by: William F. Nolan, Fred Mustard Stewart
Actors include: Angie Dickenson, Roy Thinnes, Don Porter
Genre: Horror

Length: 72 minutes

Banned: Nope

Review:

Well considering this was brought to us by the same fellow who made The Night Stalker (Dan Curtis) this was rather dull. It was a failed TV pilot that was to be about a writer named Norliss who was busy making tapes to document his journey into disproving the supernatural and the like. Of course somehow something happened and the writer has disappeared so this tv movie is based around the first tape. This particular journey (and the only one I believe) is about a woman (Angie Dickinson) who sees her dead husband kill her dog. It's got to do with ancient scarabs, a magical ring, a blood sculpture vampire/zombies and immortality. None of it is scary, the effects are simply painting a guy purple...that means he's dead and frightening? Not quite. Also the boring melodrama and awful narration (read like film noir from the tape) made it even tougher to bear. At the end of the film yes it made sense and everything and they did do a reasonable job of establishing what would have been the show. Yet this opener was so lame I'd have never tuned in to watch another sadly.

Availability:  On DVD

100 Scariest Movie Moments (2004)

4 / 5 Apr '09

Tagline: Presenting the 100 scariest movie moments: a countdown of the greatest moments of cinema shock.

Directed by: Kevin Kaufman
Written by: Patrick Moses

Actors include: Keiko Agena, Krista Allen, Clive Barker

Genre: Documentary, Horror

Length: 300 minutes

Banned: Nope

Review:

So Bravo TV did a countdown of the scariest moments in movie history, it aired in a 5 part series and I watched 'em all! I've seen most of the films on the list, in fact I've seen all but 8 of the 100 listed. Some of the choices I wouldn't say I agree with like "Child's Play"...that is scary how? Others that I don't feel fit the bill were "Shallow Grave" (it was cool but not scary), "Zombie" (again cool but scary?), "Demons" (colorful but not frightening), "The Game" (good concept but not scary), "It's Alive" (silly never near scary), "Scream" (erm no way especially not at #13) and so on. I'd do the ordering differently of course, have different things on the list and whatnot but still an absolutely reasonable and interesting countdown. Being a horror fan I didn't learn a heck of a lot, it pushed me to watch some of the ones I've not seen yet and I've learned a few tales about the movies which was interesting but most was common. It's also nice that they got footage for most of them as well as some of the people that were involved. They needed to ditch the interview with the ditzy twins that have nothing to do with anything though. It's not perfect but seldom is a countdown to please everyone, I do think that nearly anyone could get something from this at the very least.

Availability:  Not on DVD