La Nuit De La Mort aka The Night Of Death aka Les Griffes De La Mort aka The Lady of Death (1980)

3.5 / 5 Apr '11

Tagline: You Are What They Eat!

Directed by: Raphaël Delpard

Written by: Raphaël Delpard, Richard Joffo

Actors include: Isabelle Goguey, Betty Beckers, Charlotte de Turckheim

Genre: Horror, Black Comedy

Length: 94 minutes

Banned: Nope

Review:

A strangely obscure French horror film from the '80s that finally has a proper DVD release from Synapse films. The plot is about a girl who decides to work for this strange retirement home as a Caregiver. All of the patients are oddly vegetarians, the rules of the house are very strict and she's told her predecessor quit without even saying goodbye. There is also a creepy little song that the Headmistress of the house likes to play on the piano and sing, and fellow in the home who is extremely hungry. Soon it becomes clear that something else is going on and she has to make a run for it. The story is filled with many colorful characters and little blackly comedic jokes which I liked. It's also surprisingly gory (now the effects aren't great but not bad) relatively well acted and entertaining enough that it's easy watch. It's just that the mystery is quite obvious and the film treats the viewer like they are stupid in places. Still I really find it odd that this is such a rarity, it's not the greatest thing ever but certainly worth watching for horror fans.

Availability:  On DVD

The Exterminator (1980)

4 / 5 Sept '09
Tagline: A one man army. A new kind of soldier in a new kind of war.
Directed by: James Glickenhaus
Written by: James Glickenhaus
Actors include: Samantha Eggar, Christopher George, Robert Ginty
Genre: Action, Horror
Length: 101 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
This really does start out in an exciting and bloody manner and it manages to keep that pace throughout. The story is about a man who ends up going by the name of "The Exterminator" who was in a torture war situation before escaping. Then in the real world life is pretty ordinary until thugs at his workplace kill his best friend and he vows a violent revenge. From that point on we get some amusing deaths, strange situations and so forth, it's pretty decently paced. The biggest complaint is that the story is strung together inexplicably...I mean one minute we are talking to some fella, next he's hung on a pole or something, it just wasn't well assembled. Still he does use a flame thrower, many guns and this is a violent bloody treat in many ways. It's sort of like an ultraviolent superhero movie made with a lowish budget, some will love others will cringe.

Availability:  on DVD

The Godsend (1980)

3.5 / 5 July '10
Tagline: If Bonnie is a gift from Heaven...For God's sake send her back!
Directed by: Gabrielle Beaumont
Written by: Bernard Taylor, Olaf Pooley
Actors include: Malcolm Stoddard, Syd Hayman, Angela Pleasence
Genre: Horror
Length: 93 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
I've wanted to see this for ages, ever since I read the book as a kid, but it's not exactly the most available film I'm afraid. I finally did get a copy to watch and I'm quite glad because it was a bit of a treat (minus the middle that dragged an awful lot). The story is about a young couple who are currently pregnant who kindly invite in another pregnant stranger. The stranger is very weird and doesn't seem normal in the slightest, soon she's giving birth in their home! When they go to show the beautiful baby girl to the weird woman they find she's vanished! When their own baby doesn't survive they decide to take this baby girl Bonnie and treat her as their own. They have several other kids who seem kind of afraid of Bonnie as she gets older and it becomes obvious why as one by one they end up dead from tragic "accidents". This isn't the sort of horror film that is graphic, the horror is implied and discussed but not really shown. The part that is creepy is the little actress playing Bonnie, and her parent's ignorance...weird! Anyhow it does share a lot in common with other evil child scenarios but still this one is worth a view or two I'd say.

Availability:  Not On DVD yet

Mother's Day (1980)

3 / 5 Apr '10
Tagline: If you go down to the woods today
Directed by: Charles Kaufman
Written by: Warren Leight, Charles Kaufman
Actors include: Nancy Hendrickson, Deborah Luce, Tiana Pierce
Genre: Horror, Comedy
Length: 90 minutes
Banned: Australia

Review:
Hmm, well if you've seen Troma films before then you know the sort of cheapness and ineptitude one is in for. This time it appears that Troma's Charles Kaufman saw I Spit on Your Grave [Day of the Woman] and decided to make their own version. This is a tale about three bff's who have decided to go camping in a remote area for their annual getaway. After watching plenty of their ridiculous flashbacks and hearing tons of giggling and in-jokes they are carried away in their sleeping bags. Two inbred seeming thugs have kidnapped the girls in order to please Mama, she gives the orders on who to torment first. Well after several escape attempts the remaining girls decide to get revenge and well this is the best part of the film. It's gory, they use unusual methods of retaliation (Draino and axe to the crotch anyone?) and it's pretty entertaining really. The thing is it's all done in such a joking style that it's impossible to be disturbed by which seems to be the ultimate goal of the movie. It fails more than it succeeds but yet there are a few moments that fans of this sort of thing should appreciate. I liked it a teaspoon better than Les mémés cannibales [Rabid Grannies] but Bloodsucking Freaks will always be the best Troma film I've seen. Thanks to kevdog for suggesting I give this a whirl.

Availability:  On DVD

Funeral Home (1980) aka Cries In The Night

3 / 5 Mar '10
Tagline: It'll have you screaming for morning!
Directed by: William Fruet
Written by: Ida Nelson
Actors include: Kay Hawtrey, Lesleh Donaldson, Barry Morse
Genre: Horror
Length: 93 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
There isn't anything here that you haven't seen before, but the serious way they play this story makes it somewhat worthwhile. The tale is about a girl who goes to her Grandmother's house to help her change it from a funeral home to a bed and breakfast (you can see where this is going right?). As soon as they are ready to open the guests start disappearing, but why? It's a bit of a mystery and there are several red herrings but it becomes rather clear very quickly what's going on. It's not very satisfying on a gore level, it's not very frightening and although it's watchable it's not filmed the nicest (though maybe it was my cheap DVD version that made me say that). I think also knowing that William Fruet directed this made it a little bit more disappointing because I really loved his film Death Weekend which I do definitely recommend. This isn't one of the worst slashers of the '80s but it's pretty average really, this often gets mentioned as one of the underrated gems of the time but I'm afraid I feel it's rather forgettable.

Availability:  On DVD

Silent Scream (1980)

3 / 5 Mar '10
Tagline: Terror so sudden there is no time to scream.
Directed by: Denny Harris
Written by: Wallace C. Bennett, Denny Harris
Actors include: Barbara Steele, Rebecca Balding, Cameron Mitchell
Genre: Horror
Length: 87 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
I hate to say that I wasn't very impressed by this one because it does have a few things going for it. It's relatively well made and it seems as though it might have been relatively successful in it's day upon release. The acting is relatively decent, and the plot isn't bad either, the ending is even a bit of a treat yet still something was missing. We meet a young Woman named Scotty who is desperate for a place to stay until she finds this house near the beach that is available. She moves in and meets her other roomies including her love interest Peter, chunky girl Doris, nerdly guy who's romancing Doris and one of the biggest dorks ever Mason. Mason's nutty Ma (Yvonne De Carlo) lives in the house too, but don't disturb her! After tons of dull getting to know our characters (who are some of the least attractive cast ever minus Barbara Steele) and letting romance bloom crap it does finally get to where there is some violence. Sure it has some elements of the classic Psycho but not really where it counts. The soundtrack was unappealing, I didn't honestly care what happened to any of the characters and I kept thinking that something more sinister was going on then what actually was. The plot is overly predictable, it isn't very bloody and the deaths aren't inventive and really it's all been done before. A lot of people really love this one so maybe it just kinda rubbed me the wrong way but still I think it's worth a viewing if only to see Steele's character.

Availability:  On DVD

Aquella Casa En Las Afueras (1980) aka That House In The Outskirts

3.5 / 5 Mar '10
Tagline: N/A
Directed by: Eugenio Martín
Written by: Antonio Cuevas, J.M. González Castrillo
Actors include: Javier Escrivá, Silvia Aguilar, Alida Valli
Genre: Horror
Length: 95 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
Director Eugenio Martín (Una vela para el diablo [It Happened at Nightmare Inn] which is rather similar in feel to this one and his more famous film Horror Express) makes this feel a little like a Spanish version of a Pete Walker film. It's not quite as sadistic as something Walker would give us but it's very dark and serious and something very sinister is going on. Although this is rather slowly paced it's gloomy feel and mysterious plot kept me interested. A rather pregnant woman called Nieves and her older husband Joaquim move out to this house on the outskirts to live on the main floor. The older woman who rented them the house and who lives on site offers to help out Nieves during her pregnancy. Immediately Nieves doesn't like the house, she has the feeling she's been there before but Joaquim feels she's just being strange because of her pregnancy. When some people show up looking for the Doctor the confusion starts to mount... It's actually really well put together as far as the plot goes, it takes quite a while to get going but when it does it's quite the horrific tale. Although it does borrow from some of the popular movies around the time the way this is presented is quite original and I can't think of anything quite like this. The copy I was able to get my mitts on isn't the nicest and I think this does deserve a proper release. Recommended so long as you practice a bit of patience, one of the better Spanish horror films I've come across.

Availability:  This has never been available on DVD as far as I know

Fade To Black (1980)

4 / 5 Mar '10
Tagline: Meet Eric Binford, the ultimate movie buff. If you know someone like him... run!
Directed by: Vernon Zimmerman
Written by: Vernon Zimmerman
Actors include: Dennis Christopher, Tim Thomerson, Gwynne Gilford
Genre: Horror, Comedy, Action, Thriller, Drama
Length: 102 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
Now this was one heck of an original treat cram packed with various Movie memorabilia and trivia for just about any movie lover. Many of the quotes and characters were things that I know nothing of (not being a Noir fan for the most part) but much of it was entertaining. The story is about movie obsessed geek (kinda like a demented film geek version of Napoleon Dynamite) Eric Binford (brilliantly played by Dennis Christopher) who is a bit socially inept to to his hobbies. He works at a film company but isn't respected, his home life is a crappy too as he has been raised by his nasty abusive Aunt. Life starts looking up when he meets a gorgeous look-alike who actually seems to like him. Being as how she's flighty she forgets their date and stands Eric up which sends him over the edge. Soon he's emulating characters in films and painting his face and he starts believing he is the characters. The main one he becomes is from the film White Heat but he also turns into Bela Lugosi (which is why the face paint on the cover) in Dracula and many more. It really is spot the cultural reference throughout the entire film which is a great deal of fun. This will appeal to a very select few, but those who love nerds getting revenge in violent ways should absolutely love this and the comedy bits are quite funny too. This is something I'll definitely have to watch again to try and soak up even more of it, very well done especially for a rather unknown low key movie. Highly entertaining and definitely recommended, a real treat even though it's maybe technically not the best movie.

Availability:  On DVD

Don't Answer The Phone (1980)

2 / 5 Feb '10
Tagline: He'll Know You're Alone
Directed by: Robert Hammer
Written by: Michael D. Castle, Robert Hammer
Actors include: James Westmoreland, Ben Frank, Flo Lawrence
Genre: Horror
Length: 94 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
I do tend to like many movies with instructions in the title, but this was not one of them. It is a sleazy film, I'll give it that, our murderer (who is never kept a secret) is rather evil looking and says many mean things to the women he's torturing. Between acts of violence we have terrible homemade synth music, terrible acting and let's not forget the glue that holds this boring flick together....pointlessness. Whenever we don't have the killer on screen we are watching some stupid unrelated therapy take place, or a woman answer the phone for a radio show or unrelated Police work. It goes out of it's way to try to be nasty which in a way I appreciate but the long pieces of film with only stupid things happening completely ruined any effect it might have had. It's a shame that this couldn't have been made better by someone else because the idea of an evil dude killing people often does work. Watch Don't Go in the House instead, it's sleazier more cruel and exciting all the way instead of this low rent exploitation slop.

Availability:  On DVD

The Children (1980) aka The Children Of Ravensback

3 / 5 Feb '10
Tagline: ...thank God they're somebody else's!
Directed by: Max Kalmanowicz
Written by: Carlton J. Albright, Edward Terry
Actors include: Martin Shakar, Gil Rogers, Gale Garnett
Genre: Horror
Length: 93 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
After a busload of singing children (from Ravensback hence the alternate title) go through a puff of smoke (or radiation I believe it was supposed to be) and disappear. When they finally do start to turn up they have black fingernails (which means they are zombies), and when they hug their loved ones (which causes the cheap effect of their skin rotting away) death occurs. Some of the "hugging" is even offscreen...pretty lazy really not to mention that when children aren't on screen barely anything happens. Oh and this amused me, the sound they use when the kids are hugging is actually cats in heat hehe. Everything about this film is uber cheap but somehow it's to the point and easy enough to watch despite several bad actors. This is completely scareless, but maybe a slight bit better put together than some Troma features...same category anyhow. At least we are treated to people shooting children...that's always good for a fun time!

Availability:  On DVD

To All A Good Night (1980)

2 / 5 Dec '09
Tagline:  You'll Scream 'til Dawn
Directed by: David Hess
Written by: Alex Rebar
Actors include: Jennifer Runyon, Forrest Swanson, Linda Gentile
Genre: Horror
Length: 90 minutes
Banned: Iceland

Review:
Oh dear, well this is a Christmas slasher that is extremely cheap, dark and even hard to see what's going on some of the time. It was directed by David Hess (who should stick to raping women in films) and although I'm sure he's seen many slashers this 'un is proof that not just anyone can make one. It's definitely color by numbers, a group of wooden teens have a party and a killer dressed as Santa bumps them off one by one. Even the deaths weren't imaginative! The characters seem to lack motivation for most things and plenty of times they could have gotten away or gone for help or whatnot and of course they just hang out and have sex waiting to be killed without asking questions. At least most have some sort of original twist or surprise but I should note that this did come out before Silent Night, Deadly Night but Deadly Night is a zillion times more entertaining!

Availabilty:  Currently Not On DVD
To All a Goodnight

He Knows You're Alone (1980) aka Blood Wedding

3 / 5 Dec '09
Tagline:  Every girl is frightened the night before her wedding, but this time... there's good reason!
Directed by: Armand Mastroianni
Written by: Scott Parker
Actors include: Don Scardino, Caitlin O'Heaney, Elizabeth Kemp
Genre: Horror, Thriller
Length: 94 minutes
Banned: Iceland

Review:
Although it does have the odd imaginative death this film is anything but. I liked Halloween too but the lengths this film goes through to "borrow" from it are ridiculous, even the music sounds like fake Halloween music. They didn't bother with a plot though, this just has a silent large killer who sorta shows up everywhere (gee where have I heard that before?). It's filled with boring teen drama, our lead character is engaged to a feller that folks don't seem to like so much, but her ex boyfriend is trying to win her back and everyone likes this. That takes up most of the movie, but when people aren't pitching woo at Amy she's seeing the murderer everywhere. It's well filmed actually and reasonably well put together I suppose it's just the talky bits are too many and not enough really happens. Some more back story would have been greatly appreciated but if it would have made the film longer, I'd pass. It's too bad because it actually does start out a whole lot stronger than it finishes. If you adore all slashers then you'll want to see this one too but if not then this certainly won't sell you on them.

Availability:  On DVD