Something Evil (1972)

2.5 / 5 Jan '11
Tagline: N/A
Directed by: Steven Spielberg
Written by: Robert Clouse
Actors include: Sandy Dennis, Darren McGaven, Ralph Bellamy
Genre: Horror, Thriller
Length: 73 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
Considering how famous Steven Spielberg is this little made-for-tv horror film was rather a curiosity. The big problem is that it's duller than dull, even at 73 minutes it feels like a two hour epic. The plot is about a couple (Sandy Dennis and Darren McGavin) with two children from New York who stumble upon this house in the country a few hours away that happens to be for sale. "Something Evil" appears to be possessing the house, as Marjorie (Dennis) keeps hearing a baby crying and she keeps questioning her sanity. Soon she believes a spirit is trying to possess her, but what could be going on and who is trying to possess her? Really the last bit of the film is rewarding and it made a good impression but it was too little too late. It's too bad this wasn't more interesting because it does have potential and the actors do a good job at least.

Availability:  Not on DVD

Corpse Mania (1981) aka Si Yiu

3.5 / 5 Jan '11
Tagline: N/A
Directed by: Chih-Hung Kuei
Written by: Chih-Hung Kuei, On Szeto
Actors include: Ni Tien, Yung Wang, Tsu Ling Yu
Genre: Horror, Giallo, Crime
Length: 82 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
Well the "corpse" part is accurate enough, not so sure about the "mania" however hehe. This is a Shaw Brothers film that is rather unusual in that the kung fu role is very minor, that and it resembles a giallo in some ways which is odd. A man seems obsessed with sick women, you see them go home with him...then their "sexually abused corpses" surface (their words, not mine). Our killer is disguised (much like in a giallo) and although some things we know right away, others are kept from us until later. It's a bit confusing and strange but it's relatively entertaining for the most part. Also funny is the fact that the dead girls appear covered in bait....not maggots....bait. Some of the killings were a bit surprising and they did put forth some effort to make it gruesome, also they don't spare us from the corpse sex. It's not the best of it's kind, parts somehow manage to be a bit dull but for the most part it's an unusual and decent film.

Availability:  On DVD

X-Men (2000)

3 / 5
Tagline: The future is here.
Directed by: Bryan Singer
Written by: Bryan Singer, Tom DeSanto
Actors include: Patrick Stewart, Hugh Jackman, Ian McKellen
Genre: Sci-Fi, Action
Length: 104 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
I have never read one of the comic books (I'm guessing this was based on one) nor did I know anything about this going into it. An ex-boyfriend actually put this on (why he couldn't have waited until I wasn't visiting to watch it is beyond me) and well it could have been worse I suppose. The idea is that these mutants (with useful battle abilities) are outcast by society so they have a special school thing they go to. They then are faced with a battle between mutant terrorists (I guess not all mutants get along). The furry wolfman rip-off guy is the lead mutant (how original), and really the costumes and their special powers were a little too ridiculous for me to enjoy. I think I disliked this for the same reason I dislike most Troma films, I'm not a 12 year old boy. It had a beginning, an end, special effects, and action so if you look for those things in a film then this might be entertaining for you. Maybe you had to read the comics or something to really get into this, who knows? If you like superhero stuff than you will probably like this, I knew going into it I probably wasn't going to enjoy and gosh darn it I was right.

Availability:  On DVD & Blu-Ray

Gli Occhi Freddi Della Paura (1971) aka Cold Eyes Of Fear

3 / 5 Jan '11
Tagline: N/A
Directed by: Enzo G. Castellari
Written by: Leo Anchóriz
Actors include: Giovanna Ralli, Frank Wolff, Fernando Rey
Genre: Giallo, Thriller, Horror
Length: 91 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
Although this starts out amusingly enough, and it does qualify as a giallo in some aspects, it kinda doesn't in others. It's a story that takes place in the '60s where an Italian girl out to dinner with a date is taken away by anonther man (who looks just like Doc Baker from the LOHTP series) for sexy time. Doc Baker (let's just call him that for the sake of ease) takes her to his rich solicitor Father's house, but unfortunately some criminals show up to rob the place. It's really just a thriller with the two being held hostage for most of the film. It is missing the excess that I love from this style of film and it's not satisfying on a death or sex level and the plot isn't very interesting either...even as it unfolds. Credit to them for making a nice looking film and getting the mood right, it's just rather forgettable and it drags a bit. Still a big fan of the genre will want to stumble upon this at some point, I just wouldn't recommend looking for this with any sort of urgency.

Availability:  On DVD

Female Trouble (1974)

5 / 5
Tagline:  Divine Returns! with the whole "Pink Flamingos" gang in John Waters' Female Trouble
Directed by:  John Waters
Written by:  John Waters
Actors include:  Divine, Mary Vivian Pearce, Mink Stole
Genre:  Comedy, Exploitation, Crime, Horror
Length:  89 minutes
Banned:  Nope

Review:
This is my all time favorite John Waters film and in fact in the commentary he says this is his favorite too.  The whole thing is extremely over the top so if you have a problem with ridiculousness turn away.  Divine plays Dawn Davenport (and actually gets screwed by himself in the role of Earl Peterson), a girl who doesn't get cha cha heels for Christmas.  She has fit and takes off where she gets impregnated by Earl.  Her daughter Taffy (Mink Stole in her most hilarious role) is neglected and is most certainly retarded (if you ask Dawn) and in an act of rebellion she tries to stop her mother for once and for all.  Stop Dawn from what?  Well on the road she was noticed by two beauty "consultants" shall we say (David Lochary and Mary Vivian Pearce).  They have her shooting eyeliner (beauty treatments) and since they believe crime is beauty they have her doing nasty things while they take pictures.  The climax is too much (in a good way), and I pretty much laugh from the second this starts to the end.  Heck even the title makes me laugh!  It's naughty, gross, perverse but most of all highly entertaining.  This is a must for fans of this sort of sleaze.

Availability:  On DVD

A Cold Night's Death (1973)

4.5 / 5 Jan '11
Tagline: Michael C. Gwynne
Directed by: Jerrold Freedman
Written by: Christopher Knopf
Actors include: Robert Culp, Eli Wallach
Genre: Sci-Fi, Horror, Drama
Length: 74 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
Such a clever little well paced sci-fi thriller involving a scientist who studied monkeys in a remote snowy location. He stopped responding to calls so two more scientists (Robert Culp and Eli Wallach) have come in to take over the research and find out what happened to him. They find him frozen solid with a look of horror on his face and the window open, the monkeys are cold and starving and unhappy. As they settle into their posts some freaky things start happening and soon they can't help but wonder if they will suffer the same fate. It's really well made, it's very engaging and it's really short, sure it isn't graphic and gross or anything like that but a good story goes a long way and it makes a good point while it's at it too. It's also rather well filmed, well acted and darn it one of the best made-for-tv movies I've come across, it's just a shame a proper nice release has never happened for this film, it deserves it. Try to seek this one out, it's well worth your time.

Availability:  Currently unavailable though people appear to be selling bootleg DVDs

Midnight Killer (1984) aka Morirai A Mezzanotte

3 / 5 Jan '11
Tagline: N/A
Directed by: Lamberto Bava
Written by: Lamberto Bava, Dardano Sacchetti
Actors include: Valeria D'Obici, Leonardo Treviglio, Paolo Malco
Genre: Horror, Mystery, Giallo, Thriller
Length: 85 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
Well it's definitely a later entry into the giallo field and it's one of Lamberto Bava's worst but it's certainly not terrible, it is at least stylish in a way. The fashions are awful, and it's missing the gratuity one would expect in this style of film. The deaths are decent and a bit of creativity is used, and the nudity quotient wasn't fulfilled much to my Husband's dismay. The beginning in this film is quite strong at least, it starts with a violent fight between a fellow named Nicola and his Wife. Nicola leaves the seen and flees to an ex-girlfriend's house who just happens to receive a phone call while he's there stating the death of Nicola's wife. It's of course a mystery and a few other girls are killed along the way. I think I might have rated it higher were the ending more satisfying, but it sort of cheapened the film I thought. You could do worse, especially during this time frame with this style of film but you could definitely do better too.

Availability:  I don't believe it's currently on DVD

Back To The Future II (1989)

4 / 5
Tagline: It's About Time.
Directed by: Robert Zemeckis
Written by: Robert Zemeckis, Bob Gale
Actors include: Michael J. Fox, Christopher Lloyd, Lea Thompson
Genre: Sci-Fi, Comedy, Adventure
Length: 108 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
In the second part of the Back to the Future trilogy Marty McFly returns from the past only to be send on another adventure. This time he and girlfriend Jennifer and Dog end up taking the Deloreon to the future (2015 which is frighteningly not that far away). See Marty's future son Marty Jr. is about to commit robbery so they have to try to put together a plan to prevent this from happening. While this is going on, Marty buys a sports book from the future but when he brings it back to the current time it's stolen by a bully. Unfortunately the bully is smart enough to steal the time machine and alter time so guess what they have to do again... It's still a very entertaining part of the story, it's creative and I do believe anyone who liked the first one should definitely enjoy this one too (even if it's not quite as exciting). Still a definite '80s classic into one heck of an amazing trilogy!

Availability:  On DVD

Back To The Future (1985)

4.5 / 5
Tagline: 17 year old Marty McFly got home early last night. 30 years early.
Directed by: Robert Zemeckis
Written by: Robert Zemeckis, Bob Gale
Actors include: Michael J. Fox, Christopher Lloyd, Lea Thompson
Genre: Sci-Fi, Comedy, Adventure
Length: 116 minutes
Banned: Nope

Review:
So far from what I've seen I'd say this is the greatest time travel movie ever, and even the sequels are awesome! We meet typical '80s boy Marty McFly who befriends the Doc (supremely played by Christopher Lloyd) as he's working on a time travel Deloreaon! After the death of his friend Marty ends up traveling back to 1955 and find the Doc and convince him of the future so he can go home again. On his journey in the past he disrupts the future and more importantly the relationship between his Parents so he must first try and fix that before he can ever go home. It's pretty exciting, inventive and full of adventure. I think the fact that this story is so well written and well assembled that makes it such a classic that everyone should love.

Availability:  On DVD & Blu-Ray

Teen Wolf (1985)

3 / 5
Tagline:  He always wanted to be special... but he never expected this!
Directed by:  Rod Daniel
Written by:  Jeph Loeb, Matthew Weisman
Actors include:  Michael J. Fox, James Hampton, Susan Ursitti
Genre:  Comedy
Length:  91 minutes
Banned:  Nope

Review:

Ever wonder what it must be like to be a typical teenager and a werewolf all at the same time?  Well Michael J. Fox answers this question in the role of Scott Howard.  Scott is on a sad basketball team that can't win, he can't get the attention of the girl he likes (as he isn't one of the cool kids) and well he's a pretty normal dude.  When a full moon approaches, everything changes and his palms are hairy for an entirely different reason.  See his Pa is a werewolf too, it runs in the family but he'd hoped that Scott wouldn't be afflicted but guess who was wrong.  The strange thing is that the werewolfism seems to make him popular.  Suddenly he has a new vibe about him the popular kids like, the girl starts to notice him and the basketball team does better.  Can he keep it all together without people finding out his secret?  It's cute enough but pretty mindless, something to perhaps catch on tv when bored.

Availability:  On DVD

Puppet Master 3: Toulon's Revenge (1991)

3.5 / 5
Tagline:  When good puppets go bad
Directed by:  David DeCoteau
Written by:  Charles Band
Actors include:  Guy Rolfe, Richard Lynch, Ian Abercrombie
Genre:  Horror
Length:  86 minutes
Banned:  Nope

Review:

This is sort of an odd twist in the series as it's set during WW2 in Berlin.  The Nazi's are trying to work out that reanimation drug to use for the war.  Toulin catches their attention with his magical puppet reanimation secrets.  The Nazi's kill Toulin's wifey then revenge must be had with the help of our little puppet friends.  It's at least something different in the franchise, and it was colorful and fun.  Still the original flick was better but this is probably the second best in the series!

Availability:  On DVD

Mary Reilly (1996)

3 / 5
Tagline:  Evil loves innocence.
Directed by:  Stephen Frears
Written by:  Valerie Martin, Christopher Hampton
Actors include:  Julia Roberts, John Malkovich, George Cole
Genre:  Horror, Drama
Length:  105 minutes
Banned:  Nope

Review:

An overly long retelling of the Jekyll & Hyde story only with big names.  This time it focuses on a servant (Mary of course) who works for Mr. Jekyll and over time she starts to take to him (romantically even).  When Jekyll's assistant shows up she's a little stunned but finds herself charmed him too.  It really takes an interesting story and puts a boring spin on it, in fact this is pretty much a romantic film with some horror elements (not nearly enough to keep most fans happy, myself included).  Pretty much a waste of time, but I guess it could have been worse!

Availability:  On DVD