Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Squirm (1976)

2 / 5
Tagline: An avalance of killer worms...writhing across the land in a tidal wave of terror!
Directed By: Jeff Lieberman
Written By: Jeff Lieberman
Actors Include: Don Scardino, Patricia Pearcy, Jean Sullivan
Genre: Horror, Sci-Fi
Length: 93 minutes
Banned: nope
Country: USA

Well, if you just read the plot on this one it sounds like a hilarious tale of electrified vicious earthworms. I agree this is a funny premise and heck I bought the film thinking the same, plus I really liked Lieberman's "Blue Sunshine" and "It's Alive" isn't half bad either. This is dramatically worse...I mean miles and miles of nearly insufferably bad acting, illogical plot, holes left right and centre and extremely little payoff. This isn't so bad it's good either, I doubt this will have you laugh more than once or twice. The way it plays out is that this hillbilly girl (who is extremely annoying) keeps going on about her boyfriend in the city who comes out to visit her. There was a storm that flooded the area and took out the hydro so his bus couldn't get to her house but somehow she magically knew to show up in the forest right where he was coming out of. She actually drove the "slow" neighbor boy's truck out to get him, he just happened to have a ton of worms in cargo cases which escaped during this interaction. Anyhow dummy neighbor is pissed off (rightfully) when his cargo has gone missing and hillbilly chick comes back with a beau (because he's in love with her of course). From there the three go fishing and some worms jump into dummy neighbor's face (which is the coolest part of the movie) and from there he becomes a "worm zombie". What exactly does a "worm zombie" entail? Well he is wanting to nibble at people, luckily for the obnoxious characters he doesn't really kill anyone and there is only one fatality I believe the entire film. It's so extremely slow and focused on the stupid romance between the bad actors so it's damned difficult to sit through. Regardless of how interesting I've made this sound, it's much worse and trust me it just is. Not something I ever hope to see again.

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